Cayde-6: a new avenger

Chapter 14: Confusion

Song: Afterglow by Taylor Swift

We make it to the training room, amazingly without my face burning the tower down with how much I'm blushing around him. The training room is thankfully nice and empty

We warm up and I'm punching a speed bag when I hear him call from across the room,

"Hey! You fancy a spar?" I turn around a size him up, I bet I could take him, and this is where I make a fatal mistake, I forget he's a fucking super soldier and so I smile and say,

"Sure, but you have to promise not to be a sore loser Barnes."

I readjust my hand wraps and step into the ring so we're facing each other and I put my hands up,

"Alright bullets let's see what you've got."

I furrow my brows and lower my hands for a second, "Bullets?"

And before I know it he hits a perfect jab straight to my jaw,

"AH, hey that's not fair." I say rubbing the bruise.

"Because you clearly can't fight with fists. Plus it's a nickname for Poker and Caz told me you liked it." He explains ignoring my complaints,

I'm still reeling from the force of that punch but I smile. This time I keep my hands up.

"Someone put effort into that insult." I tease to which he shrugs.

I go at him with a combo of jabs and kicks, he blocks some but I hit one nice punch to his stomach, which by the way felt like punching a brick wall. I back off but he doesn't give me time to recover and is right on the offensive. We're locked in a dance of punches and kicks, bruises and bruising, neither one letting up. My knuckles start to split and bleed from having to punch his steel body over and over. There's blood running slowly down both our faces.

I'm panting and exhausted when I try to land a kick to his ribs which he was clearly ready for. He grabs my calf and drops us, pinning me beneath him. I struggle for a bit but when I realise his grip is a vice I relent my efforts to escape. That's when I realise how close we are, his grip loosens and the tension builds instantly, he challenges me in a way no one ever has.

I look at his lips but quickly try to look back in his even more distracting eyes. I feel him lean forward slowly. Just as I am about to meet him half way I feel guilt scratching against my mind. I pull back and scramble out from under his absurdly toned body. I mutter a sorry before snatching up my things and racing out the door.

Leaving Bucky sat on the floor of the sparring ring alone covered in bruises but more than anything confusion. I may have seen the blood drying and the purple hues starting to show through his skin, but the hurt he was radiating was the most obvious thing about him.

I walk so fast through the towers corridors praying I don't run into anyone. As I make my way upstairs and somehow to Natasha's bedroom. And suddenly I find myself knocking on it.

She answers the door soon after and I see her get confused and worried before I realise I probably look like I was mauled by a lion.

"Cayde...what on Earth-"

"Don't worry about it I'll get Caz to fix me up, I need to talk to you like right now." I interrupt her and talk so fast it's a wonder she understood me.

She opens the door wider with a smile letting me in clearly curious about what's made me this rattled.

"I don't know what to do." I say while pacing,

"I kissed Steve a couple days ago and I like JUST nearly kissed Bucky."

"You kissed Bucky?!"

"NEARLY. I nearly kissed him but I ran away before we did actually kiss."

"Cayde why on Earth did you do that? Yous clearly like each other. You're so cute together even I can see that."

"Because I feel bad about leading Steve on, and anyway me and Bucky are like total opposites."

"I just. They're both so amazing, Steve I feel like I can be so vulnerable with him and he's so honest when he's talking to me." I say pacing around with Nat just stares at me from her bed.

"And he's super hot."

"Yeah that too."

"I just felt so guilty kissing his best friend so soon, but me and Bucky we just CLICK he understands me, he challenges me, it feels like I can tell him anything."

"And..."

"Yes Nat and he's incredibly hot."

I keep pacing while Nat takes a seat just letting me rant and talk through this,

"But we're just so different at the same time, I'm all optimism and he's a gloomy gus. He's so serious and reserved but I'm so eccentric and..."

"Egotistical?" Natasha offers to which I turn to her with an 'obviously not' look,

"I was actually going to say fantastic and fabulous but whatever. I guess I'm just scared we're so different."

"Listen Cayde, I can tell you like them both so much. And I think there's another way round this. I know they're best friends but you should explore...other...dynamics?"

"So...date both of them?" I say confused,

"Well yeah sort of, I know for a fact Bucky and Steve have been into each other literally forever but have never done anything about it. And honest you three would be so cute together."

I nod thinking the idea through,

"But first you gotta patch things up with Bucky before he wants nothing to do with you."

She's right, of course she's right.

"I should go talk to him shouldn't I?"

"Definitely." She says with a nod. "I mean you did like quite literally sprint away when he tried to kiss you."

"Yeaaahh, Okay thanks for your help Nat."

She tells me anytime and closes her door with a smile, I walk to my room and take a shower. I don't want to show up to his room all bloody and gross but honestly I'm just procrastinating trying to figure out what I should say.

I head out my room and walk to his next door. I raise my fist and I knock. I wait there for what feels like an eternity full of anxiety when the door finally opens...