44 Seconds Stories

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Have you ever thought of me?

Have you? I wouldn't be surprised if it is someone else, you kept me sane enough in our divine yet empty void of love of ours.

Have you ever thought of us as impossible? after all the reunites, goodbyes, and promises.. do you think staying together is a forbidden fate for the both of us?

Yet, you haunted me.

You always left a fresh bruise, wounds, and scars as I do as well to you. I knew everything about you and still.. I do still.

Your hobbies, your personality, your past, your insecurities. I've acknowledged all the parts of you.

Yet, I choose to ignore the real you cause I doubted of your loyalty and love-.. you were far more unknown than the person that I knew and I wanted the person I had met before and pictured in my mind.

We're bad for each other like gasoline and a lighter.

We always burned out each other.

You always coaxed my mind with our pointless arguments and endless broken promises, and I even want the old you.

I missed the old you.

The person I fell in love with- it's not the same as you are now.

It's not the same. You turned out colder as you hid away your pathetic self, pretending to be the strong, confident person that you are now.

I knew you're suffering inside, but I'm not gonna force myself in.

We're not made for each other.

Yet, I'm so sick of seeing you with somebody.

I felt replaced, as you were having fun telling your "love" stories about of them— I listened like an idiot.

Just shut up, please shut up about them, tell me about ours, tell me about it.

Please, don't go replace me as I kept whispering to my head if only I could yell and hold your wrist for you to just stay.

Stay by my side.

You made me feel hopeless, and worthless yet you made me feel loved and good about myself that I'm always in need of it.

I hate you.
      I hate you.
            I hate you.
                 I hate you.
                   I hate you.
                     I hate you.
                        I hate you.
                           I hate you.

I love you, you fucking dipshit.