Big, Little and Tiny Sef <3

Asher.

Youssef's POV:

Asher seemed a little calmer than before. He spent a lot of time in his room, but honestly, he's fourteen so that's expected. Yusuf stopped worrying so much about him and started to settle back down. He wasn't tiny so much, but that's a good thing. Means he's healing. I do still enjoy the hour a week I get. They're both doing good at school, Asher is catching up quickly. He's good at school, just not good at teachers. He's getting better though. I'm proud of him. He's adjusted well, considering everything.

Nathan and I have been prepping kids for GCSE's the past month or so, and they are fast approaching. Asher says he's not worried for next year, and I think that's good. He'll be fine. He has to get at least a 5 in science though. I won't settle for a cop out 4. He's capable of doing amazingly.

Social services had deemed their father unfit to care for them, and he was sent to parenting classes. Yusuf wasn't brave enough to tell them everything. Neither was Asher, and the younger three had a good review. I warned Asher that this could mean a short amount of time with us, and he said it would only be a matter of time before they're back. I'm worried about them. The next court hearing is in three months to review his progress. During this time, their dad is allowed supervised visits if we see necessary. Yusuf doesn't want that, he hid with Nathan for the two hours he was allowed to be with them. Asher sat in silence the whole time.

"Youssef?" Asher called out as I was washing dishes.

"Yes Ash?"

"Why does he have to come and see us? We don't want him here."

"The goal is reunification. It always is with foster kids. Your dad, on paper, has improved. I know you don't want to see him, but unfortunately we don't get a say."

"Just tell him to fuck off. Nobody likes him. Not even Yas likes him, and Yas likes everyone."

"Hon, just keep going how you're going. Sit in silence. Yusuf hiding is enough to tell them something is wrong. When they review it again, that is something they're going to bring up."

"I want to stay with you and Nathan. You care if I do good." Asher whispered, hugging me from behind and leaning his head on my back.

I didn't know what to say to that. I'm instructed to never engage in conversation like that. Don't give them false hope of staying or going.

"Of course we care, we really love you, both of you."

Asher let go as I turned to face him.

"You won't let them take us back, will you?"

"...Ash, I will do everything I can to ensure you and Yusuf are safe. If that's with me, amazing. If that is with your father in a few months time, amazing. From what I've heard, he's trying. Obviously I haven't spoken much about that, but I doubt he will get full custody for at least another year. Not with the injuries he left Yusuf with."

"Yusuf didn't tell them it was Dad?"

"Someone had to."

"You want us to stay!"

"I want you to be safe. Like I said, that's with me right now, so I want you to stay."

"Yusuf loves you more than Dad. He won't ever say it, but he does."

"I love him too. I love you both, you're like the little brothers I begged my baba for."

Asher smiled as I said that.

"You're way better than my other brothers. They're all weird. You're weird too, but in a good way."

I laughed before pulling him into a hug. He's nearly taller than me now. I'm not a fan of that.

"Is it weird having us live here?"

"I wouldn't say weird, unusual maybe. I've had time to get used to it."

"Is it weird holding Yusuf like a baby sometimes?"

"No. It's calming, for the most part. I know it helps him a lot, but it helps me too. Proves I'm better than the people that raised me. Well, my mum anyways. My baba is amazing."

"Together we have a full set of functional parents."

I stifled a laugh.

"You're great with him. I know I act like a brat all the time and make him sit with me, I'm sorry."

"You're not a brat. You're used to taking care of him, the shift must be hard, especially trusting people you don't know that well."

"I want him to love me as much as I love him. I got horrible after Momma died, I acted like a dick all the time and thought I was mental drinking and doing drugs. He has every right to hate me, but I wish he loved me as much as I love him."

"Yusuf couldn't love you more if he tried. I asked him, the first day of school, how many siblings he has. He said four. You, and the kids. He admires you, so so much. If there's someone he doesn't love, it's Noah. He's the real dick. You cleaned up your act for him, Noah is still ruining his life, and yours and Yusuf's. He worries about him all the time, but not you. You're okay now, for the most part."

Asher turned away from me and hid his face.

"Look, talk to your brother, hm? He'll tell you just how much he loves you. He begged me to foster you because he wanted you to be somewhere safe."

Asher walked away. I think I'd gone too far so I made the decision to let him walk away and I'd go check on him soon.