Visions of Fate

4. IN THE SHADOWS OF TIME

I heard the door thud and I instantly jerked up from sleep. Still in a moment of daze, I searched around frantically to find myself in a living room enveloped in darkness, vaguely being lit up by a reality show being displayed on TV. I was seated on the couch with a racing heart that felt like I had just ran a marathon. Only this time instead of being caused by fear from a nightmare, by heart raced in shock from the sound of the door.

"Sorry honey, did I wake you up?" Mom's key jingled as she locked the door.

"No mom, I was just waking up, anyways." I said to spare her feelings, rising from my clamped position to give a bone satisfying stretch. "How was work?"

"Work was fine honey, nothing new going on," mom strolled into the kitchen, while I trailed behind her. The lights in the kitchen were dimly lit, creating a cozy atmosphere and wrapping us in warmth and comfort. "How was your day? Did Ethan eventually visit?" I watched as she poured her decaf coffee into the coffee maker, attaching a metal filter and some added water.

"Yeah he did," I fiddled with my charm bracelet, still feeling a tinge sleepy as I leaned against the door, watching as she brewed her coffee. "Long story short, he stayed about thirty minutes and eventually got a call from his work place, abandoning me as my own mother had earlier this morning when she got a call from her own workplace," I threw her a sarcastic smile.

Mom just stared at me as the smell of decaf filled the air, my weary brain inviting me to Mom's brewing beverage. I didn't even pick up a fight as I instantly agreed to its demands.

"You know you look so cute when you try to be sarcastic," she said as a twinkle jumped between her hazel eyes.

"Whatever, Mom," I tried to hide the smile that crept up my cheek as I walked over to the nearest cabinet, reaching out to grab two glasses of mugs, before pulling out two tea spoons from another drawer. "I just need a glass of some strong decaf right now." 

"You're normally not one for caffeine," Mom stated matter-of-factly as she grabbed the glasses and poured in steaming coffee. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah Mom I'm fine," I swept my hand through my hair and threw her my most pleasant smile.

But of course Mom could see right through my lie. She was Mom.

"Oh no," she set the coffee maker in its place and rushed over to grab my arms, just a little too tightly. "Ethan didn't break up with you, did he?"

"What? No." I said too quickly. How could she even think such in the first place? Ethan and I were each other's 'first and only' in every way. We shared our first kiss, first dates and would eventually share each other's first intimate moment, and become each other's first and only spouse. Our bond was forever and nothing on earth could break it. But even I knew that was the least of my problems. "We just had a little…disagreement, of some sorts, that's all."

Mom's face fell in realization. "Oh no honey, I was supposed to talk you through this, wasn't I?" She retread her hands to give a small slap to her forehead. "I'm so sorry honey. I promise tonight –"

"No," I cut her short. "You aren't going to do anything tonight asides drinking that coffee and head up to bed." It was my turn to take her hands in mine. "You're doing so much, Mom and that means the world to me. I can sort out my boy problems myself." I added, offering an assuring smile.

"My baby," Mom cradled my cheeks as her eyes glistened with happy tears. "What did I do to deserve you?" I smiled up at her as I relished this moment. Moments like these where all my pains were forgotten, completely disposed at the back of my mind as it – my pain– patiently waited for the loneliness to flood back in before it could ultimately sink in.