Petrichor

Pain

"It's all coming together," Luce said as we walked back. 

"Yeah, it's gone quick. There's still a dozen things to do, but it's exciting."

"Has Graham seen any of it?"

"No I don't think so."

"Then he'll really be blown away on opening night."

"Yeah."

"Are you guys going okay? You both seemed off this morning. Is it Tommy? You know, how you two are?" She asked. 

"What are you implying?"

"No, Len, nothing, it's just, you have to admit that you and Tommy are-"

"Are acting how you and Cohen used to act, and maybe we're a little more connected than you two were but that's because we were intimate for years and only had each other for years. I haven't done anything wrong, so whatever is wrong with Gray, he has brought on himself no matter what I say to him. But we're fine, I'm talking to him tonight."

"Okay, I'm sorry Lenny, I shouldn't assume, I'm not involved, I just care about you." I exhaled.

"I know, sorry for snapping, it's just... it's nothing." She gave me a hug before we walked in and it was much needed. Once we walked in she went to Dillon as Tommy came over to me. 

"Aren't you going to Mr Possessive now?"

"Yeah, but I wanted to check on your scar. I don't know if I'll be back tonight."

"Ah, well, let's go then."

I cleaned it and reapplied the cream.

"All done." 

"For good now, because I'm leaving in the morning," he said, looking down at me as I was still on my knees in front of him.

"So I might not see you?"

"Well, if you stay at his then yeah, you won't see me. It's for the best Mary, I'm not helping anyone by being here." 

"What about me?" I asked him, "I would've been a mess without you here."

"Funny how you're the one fixing my scars but I'm helping you."

"I can see the irony," I said, "but I'm serious."

"You know I can't stay any longer, or even visit you, we'll call, but even that will stir things up and I don't want anything happening to you." I looked down, the feeling of him leaving stirring up old memories. He lifted my head to look at him. 

"I wish I could be with you- you know to visit. Maybe in the future, after things have died down a bit."

"Well, I'll miss you."

"I always miss you." 

"Even though you're with me right now?" I asked him, a smile on my lips out of amusement. 

"I mean I always miss... you." His eyes looked through mine as if speaking through them. I sat up on my knees, my hands on his legs just above his knees to help me. When I touched him I notice him breath in roughly and close his eyes. 

"Tommy," I whispered, standing up and stepping away. "I better get going."

He cleared his throat and quickly put his top on. 

"Goodbye then," he said. 

"I'll call you," I said to him and he nodded taking steps to my door. For some reason it felt like he was leaving right now. "Wait." He turned around and I rushed over to him and wrapped my arms around his neck as he lifted me in a hug. His head rested in the crook of my neck and he held me tightly. "I'm sorry, and don't stop me from apologising. I'm sorry that you feel what you feel for me, and have for years now, and I can't reciprocate."