The Beauty in Time

34

◿𝙼𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚠◸

I've been scared to do much of anything for months now. To touch her at the wrong time, tell her the wrong thing, and make the wrong move.

I couldn't not do this though. It seemed like a big step for her at first, and she's taken a while to respond, but in the end she agrees to come with me to my parents' house for Thanksgiving.

She admitted she was just going to be home. Maybe order something and watch tv. She says she doesn't really celebrate any holiday out there since she's used to not celebrating. She told me that wasn't a sad thing when I frowned though. I don't know how it wouldn't be a sad thing, but she says she's not sad about it.

Anyway, Thanksgiving dinner is something we always have. Sometimes we have it at different houses, but we do always have it. This year it's at my parents' house, so I'm heading over there and I don't want to leave my friend alone.

I offer to stay with her before I ask her to come with me. She says no, I don't need to blow off my family to hang out with her. So, I ask if she'd come with me then.

She hasn't answered me for weeks—Which I figured would happen. That's why I asked weeks in advance. I gave her time to think it over, silently hoping she'd say she'll come with me.

And finally, the day came. About five minutes ago. She's really big on procrastination, waiting until the literal last second to answer me. Luckily, I planned ahead of us and let my family know she'll be there, figuring that if she decided against going then I'd just say she turned out to have other plans or something.

What I forgot to think about was the way she'd be on the drive. My parents live across town, it's a bit of a drive. Not too long, but it can feel longer if you're panicking about something. Which she is. She's doing it silently, but I still notice it.

I tried to assure her it'd be fine. My family knows we're not dating, there won't be any uncomfortable jokes or situations, and only my uncle, my aunt, and a couple of cousins are joining us this year. The house will still be a little full, but not overwhelmingly so.

Elle's a little too busy being nervous right now though, so my words don't really sink in yet. I have faith they will though, eventually. Maybe. Hopefully.

I won't have a problem taking her home if it gets worse or doesn't start getting better before that twenty-minute mark. By twenty minutes, if Elle hasn't relaxed a little, then she won't at all.

There is an upside to her anxiety. Now, don't get me wrong, I feel for her—I really do. The nerves suck, and even I have some of them. I'd like to be able to take them away from her, make them disappear so she doesn't feel that sinking feeling in her stomach. But I can't. So, all I can do is hold her hand when she reaches out to find mine.

Yeah. She holds my hand the entire walk up the walkway and while we're waiting for someone to come to the door. I mean, she lets it go immediately after Morgan opens it for us, but she still holds my hand for a solid minute and a half.

I move my hand swiftly to the small of her back once she lets it go, nudging her to go on inside in front of me. She does, but I think only since it's Morgan leading the way. At the very least, a little tension seems to roll off her shoulders while Morgan starts talking to her about...I don't know. A pool game they say they were playing. But Elle would've told me if she took my sister out to play pool, so I have no idea what imaginary game they're talking about.