Perfect

39. Alive

Remus woke up the next morning in the hospital wing. It was normal. He sat up in pain and drank the water and pain relief that was left out on his bedside table by Madam Pomfrey

Something was different though. His friends were sitting silently in their chairs, but they weren't talking.

Not only that, but his– their mate Sirius was missing. "Where's Padfoot?" He questioned. He might've just gone to get something to eat or was in detention, that was normal, yeah, maybe he was just there.

But– something about the grave looks on their faces told him otherwise. Their eyes kept shifting back and forth between the two.

That was when James gave a heavy sigh, "Moony– there's something you should know–"

Remus's heart shattered, they didn't even have to finish for him to know that something happened, "did I hurt him?"

Peter shook his head, "no."

"Then what?" Remus asked, it had to be awful, his friends weren't this serious, they never were, about anything even about exams.

"Remus– he told someone–"

Everything in his body stopped working. "What? No," he laughed, he smiled so big his face was starting to hurt. That- that wasn't a funny prank, but maybe if he laughed along he wouldn't hurt. They were done now, right? They were done?

"Moons, he told Severus to see for himself where you went every month and– he found the shack–"

"Did I hurt someone?" Remus asked in a timid voice. It was automatically the first thing he cared about. Did he like Severus? No. Did he want him dead? No. His hands started to shake, he coudln't live with himself if he hurt him too bad.

James gave him a remorseful look, "it wasn't' your fault–"

Remus sucked in a shaky breath, "oh god, did I kill him?"

"It wasn't Severus who was hurt," Peter spoke softly and Remus looked between the boys in a rush of confusion.

"Who did I hurt?"

James closed his eyes and sighed again, "Sirius's sister wanted to see what kind of prank we had waiting for Snape so– she went with him and when you tried to run after them, she turned into an animagus and attacked you. You got the upper-hand and–" He couldn't go on, he kept replaying it in his head. It was so– bad.

"H-how is she?" Remus stuttered. He looked to the right of him where there was normally just an empty bed where the marauders took turns sleeping, but now, there was a partition, hiding him from seeing the product of his work.

"She hasn't woken up," Peter told him sadly. "Sirius came to apologi–"

"I don't want his apologies," Remus snapped. How could he have done this? He trusted him. Now look, he was going to be feeling the consequences and Remus didn't even mean for it.

"None of her friends know yet," James explained. He knew that they would be rushing her at once. "Her brother doesn't know yet." Remus's eyes started to water, he had hurt her. She might not have been the best person, but did she deserve this? No. No one deserved this.

"Will she turn?"

"No," James shook his head and Remus sighed in relief.

"Thank merlin." He didn't want to ask the question that he was dying to— was she going to be okay.

His heart was already breaking– broken. It was shattered into a million pieces that couldn't be put back together, he felt numb. He felt lost. He felt cold. He felt alone. "W–w–will–" He couldn't bring himself to say the words.