The summer everything changed | CF

34~I'm sad

Eventually Belly and Skye got the apple bong to work correctly, so I took a few hits off it and was feeling a lot better that I was earlier. I was wishing one thing, that I could hear everyone it was hard to be engaged into conversation. I laid back down and Conrad seemed still a little grumpy, sitting in the grass on a pad with a blanket he had in his car. It was hard to talk to the group of people but one person wasn't bad.

    "You look grumpy." I pointed out bluntly he started at his phone and didn't look down for a moment. I knew he heard me.

    "You're high, I'm not grumpy just tired." I rolled my eyes at his blunt lie. He looked over at me a little surprised by my eye roll. He set his phone down and looked at me. "Someone's a little sassy."

    "I am not sassy." One good thing about Conrad was he knew how to talk at the perfect speed for me. Not too slow just relaxed and normal.

    "You are the most sassy person I know." He said again and I shook my head back and forth, my hair was laying by his hand.

    "I'm tired." I said again I know I had said it a lot. He definitely was aware I was tired. "And I'm sad." He furrowed his eyebrows concerned.

    "Why are you sad?"

    "Am I still going to get to see you if we don't have the house anymore?" That was part of the reason I was so scared to lose this house. I was scared we'd drift apart from the boys, that's not what Susannah wants. That's not what I want. He looked down like he was thinking about it, like he didn't want to lie to me. He wanted to give me the truth, I knew it. But I was scared it was going to be not what I wanted to hear.

    "I promise if we lose the house, I will come visit you." He said it proudly, like he would have said it really loud. But I could tell he was speaking lowly. I stuck out my pinky and he looked at it like it was a foreign object.

    I probably seemed like a baby when I did that, a fool. But I really meant it, I'd never broke a pinky promise before. They all knew how seriously I took it. "Pinky promise me." He stared for only a second before confidently wrapping his pinky around mine pinky. His skin was warm, mine was cold. A random thing to notice but I had. I laid my head down and looked at him. "Thank you, Con." He nodded with a soft almost unnoticeable smile.

    "You should sleep." I usually would protest but I nodded instead. That's when I noticed his finger was twisting the end of my hair around his finger. I could hardly feel it, it was such a subtle movement like he hadn't wanted me to notice. I moved my head a little closer letting my heavy eyes flutter shut, not even fighting them.

~Conrad~

I'd be an absolute idiot to break a pinky promise with her, she held them in her heart. I saw how heartbroken she was when Jere, left her last summer at the deb ball. I didn't want to do something like that to her, I already hurt her once. I didn't want to do that again.

    She fell asleep quick like she didn't sleep at all last night, but I know she had slept because she left her door open. I walked by and she was fast asleep. She had nudged her way closer to me and I had a chunk of her hair between my fingers. It was so soft, unbelievably soft like nothing I'd ever felt before. I remember last summer I told her it was messy, sometimes it was. But it always looked good, now she had red highlights in her hair. It made her green eyes look so vibrant.

    You could tell she was going through a sort of rebellious phase, Laurel was always cautious about letting the girls color their hair. But I think it looked really cool on her. She is so insanely beautiful her features were breathtaking, she had the most gorgeous eyes. The cutest little freckles on her cheeks and nose. The prettiest smile, I know that was accompanied by her having braces a few summers ago. Her lips were plump and had a few freckles on them as well.

"Hey." I heard a voice and snapped out of the trance I was in. Olive had been asleep for probably an hour now and I was just sitting here. I made eye contact with Steven and Taylor was not too far from him. "Don't hurt her again. If you're going to choose, you better stick with it. I can't see her go through that again." I know he was just trying to look out for his baby sister. They always treated her like she was the baby and she was technically the youngest but not by much.

But his words really hit me hard. I knew he was right I didn't want to play with her heart again. I couldn't. But it was so hard to choose between them. The two girls each had my heart, Steven is right I have to choose. If I can't yet, I have to be cautious and consider both of their feelings.

"Personally I'm team Jelly." I heard Taylor say to him and I looked down at Olivia. Fuck. I moved my hand from her hair and laid back to look at the sky. I was an absolute idiot last summer.

~Olivia~

I opened my eyes in the middle of the night as I felt something press against my upper back. I looked over my shoulder confused as I saw Conrad's forehead was pressing against my back. His arms crossed tucked to his body so I didn't move, his head laying against me was harmless. I looked over to see Steven and Taylor spooning which I can say I saw that coming. Jeremiah and Belly were lying right next to each other a comfortable distance away. I could feel Conrad's head move a little bit and I stayed so still. Like I was a statue. His head lifted a bit and I felt his lips against the fabric of his sweater. Right on my shoulder, then he laid his forehead between my shoulder blades like it once was before.

Is he awake? Does he know I'm awake? Part of me wanted to turn around and snuggle into him like I did that night before the deb ball. But I knew that would be a bad idea and I'd do more harm than good that way. So I just closed my eyes again and let myself fall back to sleep, before I could overthink what happened. It's not good for me.