Three Phantoms of You [bxb]

Dead in Kiss

Kiev:

I can't sleep.

I'm having more thoughts than a specter of phantoms in said world.

If my self is watching me right now, he'll definitely feel nothing else but enjoyment because I'm nothing else but fucked up and losing my mind.

How fun. 

Yet I'm still calm somehow. It's just deprivation that hits me. All of this might not make sense, but it doesn't mean that I'll die in the end, right? Hell, the messages aren't even direct threats; they're just all over the place.

And I couldn't help but laugh even as I hurled myself next to Nolan, lying on my side of the bed.

"Why?" he asks, and I can feel how warm his breath is under the sheets.

I still haven't opened my eyes even though my mind is far from drowsiness as I pretend to be asleep; however, he easily catches my bullshit. "Something's up. Tell me."

Sighing, my words became even more muffled as I replied to him. The last time we were in this spectacle of intimacy was when I was sick and he was taking care of me. "This day just messed me up," I curse.

He chuckles lightly, putting whimpers at the top of my list of the hottest things ever. "If you feel that, what more to me?" he affirms.

Yeah, Nolan definitely got the short end of the stick here. He doesn't know a thing, yet somehow he's caught up in all of this. Being in the same world as his other self is definitely confusing, especially for me since I'm mostly with the both of them.

They were hard to tell apart before, but I get both of them now. It's like seeing different sides of him, and even with all this mess, I'm happy that one phantom of him saw me more than someone who's incapable of feeling even if he doesn't belong here. 

"Yeah," I say to him. "Can you help me sleep?" 

It's the least of his responsibilities right now, but I want him to throw them all aside just so I feel prioritized. Look at me being so clingy. 

But I didn't have time to feel bad for asking, though, as he took my hand, wrapped it around his body, and let it stay there. I'm the one cuddling him. "Is that fine? You fancy being the big spoon, right?" he asks jokingly.

My mind tailgates each notion he suggests, especially since it kind of sounds familiar. The same words were said when he was teasing me when I was sick. "How can you say?" I inquire.

He looks at me with eyebrows raised. "You're always the one hugging me whenever we sleep." Oh, right. "Like that one time you told me you hate cuddling, then suddenly hugged me in the middle of the night. That was really funny."

I couldn't help but be stumped. This would all make sense if he were the other Nolan, yet he isn't. I'm with the real one at the moment. I even checked his scar as an indication. So how come he knows all this?

My mind is in turbulence, crashing while overfilled with thoughts. However, I was once again enthralled as I felt soft lips amble over my forehead in an affectionate manner. 

As if his kiss isn't driving me overdrive already, he continues to hover his mouth down my face, capturing every little scrap left of my nakedness until he reaches my lips.

There, he immediately pulled me out of my slumbered thoughts as he navigated his way into euphoria with just his mouth. It tastes like yearning and assurance, and I let him promise to take me away from all this mess.

However, it didn't last. As our kiss became longer, his lips somehow faded away in a worthless feeling—ghostly and numb, just like the sensation I felt back at the cafe even if we hadn't moved away from each other.