Blond Hair & Smudge Lipstick // Jj Maybank

Chapter 31

                        Ellie Standley's POV

Seeing JJ that night was more hard than I thought. I had to take everything in me to not give in.

I was still hurt by our breakup, still hurt by how dry John b is.

I realize it maybe wasn't his fault, maybe I should've ask him why.

So I asked him at the party.

But this bitch was acting like it was my fucking fault.

I asked him why, he didn't answer me, and blame it all on me. I wish I could've know the reason of our breakup, but boy was too selfish to tell me.

He was acting all mad and shit, I gave him a second chance but he skips it, he could've tells me why, maybe I would've understand why he wishes for us to stay away.

But I don't, since the asshole didn't tells me. He was like you betrayed me and but god, he's the one betraying us by avoiding us, for a reason we don't even have the right to know.

I feel like it isn't fair, I should've know, with a reason, I can't blame him from keeping us way but I do.

At least JJ should've know, since he's closer to John b than I am, but clearly he doesn't since he beats him half to death at the party.

I know he's mad at John b, but he should asks him, because I don't think being mad because he keeps us away is the key.

He should be mad because of the rule, maybe because JJ's his best friend he will answers him, they can get talk and me and JJ can get back together without any beef.

I'm laying peacefully in my bed, I know I changed, but at least I got a little over it.

Our memories still make me cry, but that okay, at least I don't cry all the time.

Reading books change my mind, which is great.

I'm spending more time for myself and with Kiara, or with my mom.

She made and understood why I should ask John b about why the rule, that why I show up.

When I told her our whole conversation, she was decided at not liking him.

The famous night was two weeks ago, the number of books I've read in those past four weeks has been, big.

I finish the twisted series, the King of sin too, now I'm reading the Shatter me series. Sometimes it's makes me cry because Aaron Warner has blond hair, like JJ.

I'm listening to all the sad songs I can find, mostly Olivia Rodrigo. I've did heard from JJ, thought.

Two days after the party, he sends me flowers, which made me cry, but the boy needs a clear definition of space.

He sends me a letter where he says he's writing letters for me to read when I'm ready, that made me cry too.

Another one of his ring three days ago, which made my mother cry, and me. God I know she miss him, he's like her child, and I feel bad for her.

I've received a book, yesterday, anonymous, but there's a not at the end, I say just when I finish it, and I just knew it was him.

"I hope you liked it, sorry for my messy writing, you know how I am. Have fun reading without me bothering you, I love you."

I already knew it was him without the note, but the confirmation. And the message made me cry my eyes out.

The "have fun reading without me bothering you" gots me, and then the "I love you" got me harder than the first time.