$ugar ($outh $ide $ugar $equel)

-Roots

I spent the next few weeks at my own house, I stayed away from Ruby and Scrim. I wasn't scared but I just wanted to take the time to actually process the face I was Inlove with two fucking killers.

But I mean, it's new Orleans you do what you gotta do and you don't speak on it.

I hadn't talked to Ruby since that night, I mean.. I was kinda avoiding them. But not really.. I just wanted to be alone, but every time I feel like this it calls for a relapse.

I was laying on my bed, I hadn't really gotten out of it besides to shower and go eat and walk blue.

I heard a knock at my front door, I groaned going downstairs and opening the front door. It was Scrim, he looked at me before kissing me softly.

"Hi baby" I said softly, he laid his hand on my cheek. "You're burning up" he told me, "I know" I said, "You sick?" He asked.

"No, I don't know I haven't felt like getting outta bed" I said softly, "You okay?" He asked me.

"Yeah I'm okay, I'm still sober and shit" i said stepping aside so he could come in, he walked inside my house and his eyes scanned the place.

"If you thinking bout robbing my ass for some dope, I'm gonna hurt you" I said shutting the front door and he chuckled.

"Nah I got my own money bae" he told me and I chuckled, "why you here?" I asked walking upstairs with him following behind me.

"Wanted to check on you" he told me, I nodded sitting down on my bed with Blue. Scrim laid down with me, he laid his head on my stomach.

I sighed, laying my hands on his face. "I love you" he told me, I smiled. "I love you to Scott" I said.

He relaxed, "You okay Pa?" I asked him and he nodded. "Please don't put pressure on my stomach" I said and he lifted his head up laying his head on my pillows.

He laid his head on my shoulder, falling asleep. I smiled turning my TV down, before falling asleep with him.

When I woke up, it was almost 7 at night. Scott was gone, I figured he was gonna be.

I got up walking out my room with blue following behind me, he was starting to get big.

I walked downstairs and locked the front door, before walking to my backdoor and letting blue run around the fenced in yard.

I sat down on my Porch, lighting up a cigarette. Just watching blue run around and play, "Blue use the bathroom baby it's cold" I said softly.

He just stared at me, before taking off rubbing around the yard. Typical.

We sat outside for about 30 minutes before we actually went back inside,

Ruby called me a few weeks later telling me that Scrim was losing his shit and asked if I wanted to Ride with him and Kyle Down to Florida.

I said of course, I left Blue with my friend and soon, me and them went to Florida.

When we got there, Ruby knocked on his door.

"Hollon a minute!" You could hear scrim say, "fuck that" Ruby said after getting impatient after a few minutes.

Ruby opened his door, "Ay bruh sit down we need to talk" Ruby told him, and he shrugged coming outside his apartment.

"You seriously think that fucking Southwest airlines, is tryna fucking kill you bro?" Ruby asked,

Scrim blank stared at him, "Yes" Scrim told him. Ruby tossed his phone on the ground and it sparked and cracked.

"Motherfucki- Scott" Ruby said making me chuckle, "It's not fucking funny Angel " Ruby said which just made me chuckle even harder.

"Fuck- I'm sorry but" I said laughing trying to catch my breath. "Dude southwest airlines is not fucking worried about you" I said watching Ruby pick up his cracked up phone.

Scrim, shrugged. "Get up, fuck this pack your shit" I told him, "Are- are you serious?" He asked me, "Yes im fucking serious Scott if you don't get up I'm gonna fuck you up" I told him my smiling face going to a serious one.

Scrim stared at me for a few seconds, "Up nigga,now go!" I said rushing his ass, he rolled his eyes and walked away into his apartment.

"Why you telling him to pack his shit?" Kyle asked me, "I'm shipping his ass off, he needs it" I told Kyle and Ruby looked at me.

"He's in psychosis Ruby, obviously. You can littearly hear the drugs in his voice" I told him.

"Just cause-" Ruby said softly, "I will fucking beat your ass, shut up" I said leaning against the wall.

"And I'll buy you a new phone, you clutz" I said and he chuckled.

After a few minutes Scrim walked out his house, "I love you Scott, and you know I'd never say this but. Your ass needs to get sober, I love you and I know it's hard but. You need it baby" I told him and he nodded, "I wanna get sober.." he said softly like he was scared to.

"C'mon I gotchu" Ruby said wrapping his arms around Scotts neck as they walked to his car. I watched them walk away for a few minutes, before following behind them with Kyle.

"How long you been sober?" Kyle asked me, "Almost two years" I said softly, "How the hell do you do it?" he asked me "Uh, alot of sleep and a lot of nicotine" i said and he nodded.

By the end of that month, Scott was in Rehab. And I was at home, just watching tv all the time and never getting out of bed. But I stayed clean and sober.

For as long as that lasted.

I lost it the night I got a call about my mom,

"Hello?" I said softly into the phone, "Hey, uh is this Angel?" The female voice said softly.

"Yes this is she" I said, "Hey, this is Meghan. Your mom's friend. I'm sorry sweetheart but your mom overdosed and passed away." She told me, "oh.." I said softly,

"Yeah I'm so sorry sweetie, I'm here if you need anything. My condolences" she said, "Thank you" I said "of course sweetie, bye bye now" she said hanging up with her heavy new Orleans and country accent.

I lost it that night, two years down the drain over a fucking deadbeat addict who couldn't give two fucking shits about me.

What made it even that worse that night, was when the door to my bedroom opened and my eyes were met with a,

3 month sober scrim.