Dear Diary and yes I will call you Dear because I'm in a kinda good mood,
Today's another day because the sun start to rise and decided to shine like a queen that she is. I have this former professor that is kinda cute and kinda gay so he still within my criteria of dating. Whenever I cross path with him I always greet him with Hi Sir in a flirty yet playful way. I love that he smile like an idiot whenever that happened. His smile that is kinda gay —his cheekbone will be visible and his eyes will be hidden within that smile. It's kinda cute in a gay way and that kinda make me feel good.
But just like any of those people I liked, I am nowhere within their league. And that kinda sting like a bitch. This stupid heart that will always flutter whenever my eyes caught a sight of a cute guy, my stupid heart that always skip a bit whenever my type of guy will exist and decided to walk within my line of vision. That tingling sensation within my bone that give me power to take a whiff of cute guys even though they're still far away. And it kinda sucks when I discover that all of them are not within my league and the worst for my part and great for them is that they already have their THE ONE.
Maybe I will just be an old gay guy until I will take my last breath—no one to hold my hand, no one to take a sit beside my wheelchair when I take my last breath in front of the horizon. I'll be alone till the end. I guess that will happen and it's kinda hurt to tell myself that I should probably start accepting it little by little so that I would not be THAT surprise if it will happened to me someday—and THAT thought alone is making me frown... the mere thought that FAITH have the audacity to create my gorgeous self and when FAITH take a quick look at me deciding that ehhh this one is kinda the type who will survive with the company of his own shadow, which is probably true but come on! At least a decent human being to company me will do, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
"Good luck with your final examination Samuel!" I smile at Tristan before I stare at nowhere.
What a lonely life I would have and I'm not looking forward on it ever.
Your ever so gorgeous,
Samuel the Prettyƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ
