Putting the final finishing touches on my wedding gave me relief I've never known before. I could breath and sit back, enjoying what my new life post wedding planning had to offer.
I was done with everything, now it was just the fact of getting married over all star weekend. I was just glad to have it all done now, less to worry about and a chance to get back to my bookstore. The very small guest list was set, invitations were sent out and Jabari was now incorporated into the wedding as the ring bearer. It was only a few months out now, and I couldn't wait for the winter wedding of my dreams to my fiancé who was technically my boyfriend.
I sat on the couch with my phone in hand watching Jabari hold an intense stare with the TV as Bluey was on. His purple pacifier was moving back and forth as he watched the TV and babbled every now and then, laughing and smiling.
I was laughing too at what he was saying, which was a bunch of nothing. He was such a funny baby. I snapped a few pictures and took a video of him being adorable. I so badly wanted to send it to someone but the list in my head on who I could send it to was shorter than I thought.
Tamryn doesn't know about him yet, I haven't seen her in so long and I haven't been in contact with her. I don't have any other friends, and my parents... They're the ones who tried to keep us apart. I kept worrying about how my parents would react when they realized the mistake I made that they tried to cover up would be holding the rings at my wedding.
"Ok I gotta run." Aaron said snapping me out of my thoughts of my parents wrath that started getting out of control. I locked my phone throwing it on the couch and stood up waiting to get a goodbye kiss from him like he always does.
But he just picked JD up, gave him a kiss, and handed him to me before saying goodbye to me again, quickly this time, and heading out to practice. I stood there dumbfounded with my lips still puckered waiting for him. My mind immediately went to the worst.
Did he change his mind about our wedding?
Was he mad at me?
Did he want to break up with me?
What did I do?
I tried to shake the thoughts from my head. I must be overthinking. right? I sat with Jabari for a little while longer to try to take my mind off of the interaction. After I put JD down for his first nap of the day, I mindlessly did a few chores around the house, blank staring at the dishes, laundry, and the vacuum, and sighing until my lungs hurt from inhaling so much air. Then the thought came to mind that I could just ask him. I should text him to get clarification, we did promise to work on our communication together.
I didn't know me and my boyfriend were beefing 🤪
I sent the text and went back to doing my chores. I felt better speaking my mind to him, even if it was in a text. I walked around a little lighter and read a magazine, humming a little song to myself. But after Jabari woke up and I still didn't get a text from him 2 hours later I started to worry.
He should be done with practice by now, why wasn't he back home yet? I didn't want to be the clingy girlfriend but I couldn't help but wonder what was going on between us. In the short time I've known Aaron he has never been distant like this to me. I took a deep breath and looked at the clock. One more hour, I'll run out to Target with the baby, clear my mind with some shopping, and then if he hasn't answered me by the time I would call him. Besides, I hardly ever use my car anyway, it's a good time to drive around with Jabari and clear my head.
As I was putting a cute outfit on Jabari and he seemed happy to be going out. He was stomping in his blinding white Air Force ones as I put moisturizer in his hair. It grew so much and was long enough to put in braids. Maybe we could go do that do today too, I'm sure Aaron would love the surprise.
