Let me love you || RYEJI

16

Two days had passed since the breakup with Ryujin and Yeji was still just as broken. Her decision wasn't easy and she also felt that she partly regretted it, but she kept thinking that it was the right thing to do, that she didn't deserve someone like her.

She knew she could no longer hide her breakup, but she was aware that if she told her friends about it, they would stop asking her about Ryujin, since she had been the star topic in the last conversations on the phone. Through the cell phone it was quite easy for her to hide it, although she didn't know why she was doing it either. Well, yes, she did. Her friends would not hesitate to tell her that she had made a big mistake and she didn't feel like having to deal with it.

"Why does it look like I'm talking to the wall?" Lia, who had gotten Yeji to go for a walk with her, blurted out somewhat annoyedly. Yeji understood her attitude perfectly, so she decided to be brave and face the situation.

"I broke up with Ryujin."

"Excuse me?" Her short but concise question and her gesture made it very clear to her that she didn't agree with her decision.

"Didn't Chaeryeong tell you?" She asked.

"No." She replied confused. "That bastard is very loyal to Ryujin." She stated. "But, tell me. What the hell happened?"

"I'm not ready for a relationship."

"Why the hell do you say that?"

"Because it's the truth." She replied without hesitation and her friend frowned. Yeji shrugged at her words. She didn't feel like carrying on with that conversation. She would have time to torture herself, as she did every night, when she went to sleep and all the memories and scenes were projected inside her head.

"Why do you think that?"

"I just... I felt like I wasn't enough for her. She deserves someone who has their life together, someone better, and I'm not that person right now."

"Cut the bullshit, please."

"It's not bullshit, it's how I feel."

"And it's valid you feel that way, but let me tell you something and don't interrupt me, please." Lia took a deep breath. "At first you were reluctant to date her because you weren't over Minju, during the process you decided to quit that stupid dance studio and then that's what became an obstacle because you've been hell bent on believing that your life is worthless if you're not dancing. Is it possible that you've actually been determined to sabotage, unintentionally, your own happiness?"

Yeji looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds, analyzing what her friend had just told her.

"I know, but it doesn't change how I feel." Yeji admitted, wiping a tear from her cheek. "She deserves someone who isn't a mess like me."

"Yeji, you're not a mess." Lia insisted. "You're going through a tough time. But let Ryujin be by your side, it'll be worth it in the end." She assured her. "Let me ask you something, how did Ryujin react to the breakup?"

"She told me she respected my decision, even if she didn't understand it. She said that if I needed anything, I should call her." She said, trying to hold back tears. "Even when I broke her heart, she was nothing but kind." Lia nodded, it was exactly the answer she needed to hear.

"You know what I think? That Ryujin is exactly the person you deserve and need by your side right now, Yeji."

The cat-eyed woman didn't know what to say, the weight of Lia's words hanging in the air. She knew her friend was right and Yeji felt a glimmer of hope. Maybe one day she would feel worthy of Ryujin's love. And maybe, she should give their relationship a chance and allow herself to grow in the process with Ryujin by her side.