Surviving Stirling

Chapter thirty six

The peachy-apricot glow of dawn painted the sky outside, it was so beautiful here. A view carefully crafted by time honoured scenery.

Stirling had brought me to some kind of luxury lodge set high up in the Montana mountains. It was the kind of quaint place celebrities would come to get the five star treatment.

I bet it looked serene in the winter, snow falling lazily - devouring the city, white dusting the treetops, glittering frost in every direction. It would almost be magical, I really wanted to see that.

I looked over at him, he was rubbing his palms together before holding them out to gain warmth from the smouldering coals in the fireplace.

He was never a man of many words, especially when it came to feelings so I didn't expect us to talk about our kiss and what it meant but that didn't stop me from wondering.

I would have loved nothing more than to know what was going on inside of his brain, but as he watched the fire reflect from the logs like a flutter of burning butterflies, I honestly couldn't imagine him thinking anything other than, 'ooh, fire.'

I smiled at that thought.

Steam lifted from the mug of hot cocoa I had my hand curled around and I blew it away softly knowing I ought to make conversation before the silence slipped from comfortable to awkward.

"How did you afford this place Stirling?"

His eyes flit to mine, "I paid for it out of cash."

"Cash?" I questioned innocently, a place like this surely cost a lot of money.

He nodded his head towards a blue sack sitting out on the coffee table and reiterated his answer, "cash."

Man, that was a large amount of money.

I grew closer and peeked inside at the stack of dollars. He watched me curiously as I picked one up, throughly inspecting it. "Is this real?"

"About as real as the Kardashian's after surgery."

I narrowed my eyes on him for half a second before turning my attention back to study the money in my hand, front and back.

It felt real. It looked real.
How on earth would anyone know the difference?

"It's like a carbon copy of actual money, it even smells like real money.

"I'm good at what I do."

My eyes snapped onto his, "but you're ending it, all of this criminal activity. You're going to stop it, right?"

He inadvertently took a step forward, like he had invisible strings pulling him closer to me. I knew why he was doing that, subconsciously trying to create a sense of calm before he sliced the dagger through my bubble of hope.

"If I walk away it will cause a rainfall shit storm."

"So grab your umbrella and crack on."

He rolled his eyes skyward, "Aurelia, you don't understand. If I tell Dean Wilson I'm out then it's not gonna come back on me. It's going to reflect badly on Kingsley. I want to be with you, but not at the expense of my brother and I can't be with you if I don't walk away."

My happiness suddenly plummeted, I didn't fully understand what he meant and I couldn't even begin to, I just know I felt incredibly sad.

"Kingsley hates your lifestyle, he has asked you to walk away countless times. He's not involved in any of that so don't try to pin the blame on him. Just admit you don't want to walk away Stirling. You said it yourself, you enjoy the power it gives you."