If I Had More Time (A StSg fanfic)

Chapter 10 - Final moments.

His last thoughts

"Disbelief and confusion. Those two emotions express how I felt after hearing that Getou Suguru killed an entire village. I didn't want to believe that my best friend had killed so many innocent people. Not after we had spent so long together talking about the purpose of a jujutsu sorcerer.

"Not him. It just couldn't be him." I thought. I didn't want to believe it. I wouldn't believe it. But the longer I stayed in denial the longer I realized; that man had thrown away our friendship. It was him. He admitted it to me with no hesitation.

I considered letting it all go, and remaining friends with him even after all the monstrous things he's done. I didn't want to be ripped apart from him, to be distant from him. But I was told that I was being ridiculous and crazy, for holding onto nothing after what he's done.

He was looked at like a monster, a traitor, a disease. They wanted him dead, but Yaga protested. All for going against Jujutsu High. Something I dreamed of doing during my younger days. It was he who inspired me to become a teacher at this school, believe it or not. His defiance taught me that the higher-ups are weak and afraid.

They would kill someone whose beliefs don't match up with their own, just to save their asses. So, I decided to fight back against them in my way. They should not be allowed to steal the youth from children for any reason necessary.

Years later I still blame myself for not telling him how I feel. Back then, I never wanted to tell him how I felt, I didn't want to ruin what we had. But the main reason why, was because I had always thought that I would have more time to get to know my feelings.

Looking back now, if I had more time, I would never have hesitated to tell him. I would have said something the second I knew. I had the opportunity to tell him during his last moments, but I couldn't bear to curse him with my selfishness. He deserved to find peace in the afterlife, so I stayed quiet.

Oddly enough, in my own final moments, I thought of Suguru. I have no regrets about anything in my life, I trained teenagers into strong sorcerers who will lead the next generation of Jujutsu society. Though it is unfortunate to leave them, I believe that I have done more than enough in this life.

Hey, Suguru. It's snowing, just like it was on that day. Maybe in the next life, we're allowed to be carefree and live without the world's weight on our shoulders. Maybe then, I can tell you that _ ____ ___."