Lovin' You Is Easy (A Sophitz Story)

Part 13

SOPHIE POV

Her mind was as dark as her heart. She had no point to go back, it's not like anyone would care whether she lived or died. Fitz was probably mad because she was taken, and she hadn't spoken with him in days. She had no purpose. 

Until the blurry senses came back days later, Sophie saw her family and friends around her. Except for someone.  Him. Her face fell, she thought it had all been a dream. She closed her eyes again in misery as she felt many pairs of arms wrap around her. 

Biana's makeup was running as she pulled away from the hug, she hugged Sophie again, tighter as if she didn't believe her best friend was actually awake. She whispered, her voice dropping and rising as she fought raw emotion, "You're my best friend Sophie, please don't do that again. I love you too much for that." 

Sophie cried as she repeated the same thing to her best friend forever. In her heart, she felt blank and empty. 

She needed to rescue him. Rescue him from herself and from his own mind.

FITZ POV

His mind was teeming with thoughts, only about her, she was his only thought.  He knew that he loved her even more now. He had loved her since they were kids. He was so stupid for this to happen, and it was all his fault for what happened to her, and now, when they were both on the brink of death, ready to leave, and he hadn't even told Sophie the most important thing, that he loved her and wanted to raise a family.

Sophie POV

Fitz

I know that when you read this you'll blame yourself, but don't. I chose this. Don't talk bad about yourself when everyone knows the truth.

I can't just stand there watching you watch me when I can't offer you anything in return, I can't love you the way you can me. I want you to find someone else. Please, find anyone, anyone. I need you to be happy and be with someone who can give you what you deserve.

I love you Fitz, and I want and need to have a future with you, but this is for the best. You treat me and protect me so well and I don't think anyone else can do that. But don't just do it for me, do it for everyone. Keefe and Tam and Dex, your best friends. Biana, your sister. Your amazing parents. Me The girl who you chose for some weird reason. The girl who is not worth it for you. Fitz, i love you. But i'm not good enough, you have the whole world to choose from. 

I would love nothing more than to raise a family and share all my problems with you, but I need you to think about yourself for just a second.

I love you so much,

Sophie

Sophie cried as she finished her letter on the hospital bed. She would rescue Fitz from his mind, and then tell him, show him the note. Biana had cut her off when she figured out what Sophie was doing, she had said that Sophie was the best thing that ever happened to Fitz and that it wasn't one sided. The rest of her friends had followed the same sentiment.

She was alone. Alone as she snuck out of the healing centre, to Everglen, where Fitz was. Alone as she tiptoed into his bedroom, where they had kissed and stole hugs so many times before. Her heart nearly broke as she said Fitz laying on the bed, practically lifeless. Before she knew it, Sophie bent down to her boyfriend, soon to be ex, and kissed him passionately. 

She sat there for hours, playing back her favourite memories of them, the little handholds over the years, their confession, their first date, their first kiss, the day they met. Sophie started to sob silently. 

The last thing she said to him that night was "I love you. Find someone better. Please."

And she kissed him again.