The Wrong One (Destiel)

Chapter 9

CAS' POV
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"Accident" Every word that leaves Gabriel's mouth is like another dagger in the heart "Flipped". I feel like I'm getting stabbed over and over, like someone's twisting a knife in my gut "injured" the pain is just unbearable, I collapse on the ground right in front of my brother "DEAD" ...the last thing Gabriel says. Anna, Jimmy, and Claire, they were all in the car driving down the road when someone hit them, flipping the car. A hit and run.

I curl up on the ground the same word playing through my mind like a never ending loop DEAD, DEAD, DEAD, DEAD. Anna is dead. Killed on impact. Jimmy's in critical condition undergoing surgery right now. My sweet little Claire all by herself on some hospital bed surrounded by strangers.

I can't move, I'm frozen the only movement is my quivering lip and the tears streaming down my face. Gabriel is kneeling beside me crying into my shoulder. We're a hopeless wreck crying in the middle of a hospital lobby with people staring at us. Some look on with pity, others with pain, and some with sadness.

We slowly begin to regain our composure, the tears haven't stopped but the violent sobbing is at least at a minimum. I know there's nothing I can do to help, so I'm left with the dreaded task of waiting. Gabriel and I are sitting in the lobby for hours with no news on Jimmy or Claire. I go up to the reception desk and ask multiple times if I can speak with a doctor or if they have news on my family but each time I get the same reply "I'm sorry for the wait sir, please have a seat and I'm sure a doctor will be with you shortly." Every. Single. Time.

More time passes with more trips to the reception desk and no sign of a doctor. I debate going back to Deans room to pass the time but then I look down at Gabriel, he's leaning on my shoulder fast asleep, he was here all alone for hours, he was the one who had to suffer through the news of Anna's death on his own, he was the one waiting here for hours trying to get a hold of me. I left my little brother alone at his weakest moment so now the very least I can do is stay with him now.

I try to sleep but it doesn't work. Every time I close my eyes I relive Gabriel telling me what had happened. The same words are still floating around in my head accident, flipped, injured, and DEAD. It's like that's all I can think about. I close my eyes trying to imagine a happy place. I imagine Jimmy and Claire DEAD no they're fine happily playing. They're laying on the ground DEAD now they're just resting, sleeping peacefully. Nothing in wrong. DEAD. Nothing is wrong. DEAD. Nothing i- DEAD. DEAD. DEAD. DEAN. DEAN. DEAN. I concentrate on Dean. All the bad thoughts I change and think of Dean. His green eyes, the way he blushes, his body, his smile... I finally start to drift off.

"Excuse me, sir? Uhm, sir?" I'm awoken by someone gently shaking my shoulder, "Ah hello there I'm Dr.Song, are by chance Gabriel or Castiel Novak?"
I jump out of my seat, waking Gabriel in the process, "Y-yes I'm Castiel how are they, they're doing fine right, they're going to make it?" I stare at the doctor searching in their eyes for the spark of good news but all I see is guilt, and my whole world crumbles.

"Claire has a broken arm and four fractured ribs. At this point she is recovering quite well and will most likely pull through so long as there are no complications and the injuries are properly treated." So there is hope, my little niece is a fighter.
Gabriel who's finally fully awake speaks up "What about Jimmy and his surgery? Did everything go alright?"

I'm confident Jimmy made it through until the doctor opens her mouth "I'm so sorry but his injuries were too severe, he died on the operating table." Gabriel breaks down crying but I stand there not making a sound. No tears, cries, or sobs it's just nothing, and then I run. I don't know where I'm going or why I'm running but I don't stop. I run by stores, through alleys, and across roads dodging people and cars as I go. I'm running from my feelings, I'm running from my pain. I run down gravel roads, through fields, the cold air stings my lungs with every breath. I know if I stop all the emotions will hit like a hurricane and I don't want that. I don't know where I am but that doesn't stop me. I run taking turn after turn until I finally hit a dead end. I can barely move my legs and I collapse on the ground letting to cold air and emotions wrap me in a painful embrace.

I feel so, so empty. It's almost as though a piece of me is missing, Jimmy and I are- were so close. Jimmy was my twin, he was always there for me. Jimmy and I were so alike in so many ways but there were so many differences too, differences that made Jimmy better. Jimmy is- was the smart, funny, and kind twin while I was the stupid, sad, and depressed twin. He was stronger, he knew how to handle bullies, how to defend himself, but most off all he knew when to take responsibility. He took responsibility of Claire when her own mother wanted nothing to do with her. He raised her pretty much on his own, somehow balancing school, work, and just being a dad to a sweet little girl. He was better. Claire? She won't get to see her father again. He wanted to give her so much. He always said she deserved the world and planned on giving it to her but now, he can't.

I stand up and I know what I have to do. I start jogging back the way I came hoping I can find my way back to the hospital. I'm going back to that hospital and I will be at Claire's bedside cheering her on as she fights through her injuries. I'll be there as she heals and I will step up and be the father figure she'll need. I keep thinking about everything Jimmy talked about giving her, doing for her, and he may not be able to do it now but I sure as hell can! With each thought my speed picks up and I try following the path that I took to get here.

Soon I realize I don't know where I'm actually going, I'm as lost as ever. My pace begins to slow until I come to a complete stop and look around, everything looks the same and I feel so god damn lost. I reach in my pockets searching for my phone but it's not there. I start panic, I run frantically down the road hoping I'll see a car or a sign back to town but I don't recognize any signs they don't help me at all. I lay down in a ditch and look up at the dark sky, there's no stars tonight. It's been such an exhausting day and all I can think of is how big I've messed up now. I can't do shit for Claire if I can't get back to her! I feel horrible. She's stuck with the fuck up twin. She's stuck with the wrong one.
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*DUN DUN DUN You guys have no idea how long Ive been waiting to use that last line😂*