Child of the Moon

Phineas Really Let Himself Go After Ferb Left

The screaming and the weed whacker helped.  We bought lightweight Polartec jackets with our supplies, and bundled up against the cold rain as we walked.  This time Percy was smart and brought most of his supplies from the boat.  He even stuffed the macrobiotic jerky in his coat pocket, in case he needed to threaten any more killer whales.  We saw some bicycle traffic and a few homeless guys huddled in doorways, but the majority of Portlanders seemed to be staying indoors.  As we made our way down Glisan Street, I looked longingly at the folks in the cafés enjoying coffee and pastries.  I was about to suggest that we stop for breakfast when I heard a voice down the street yelling.

???: HA!  TAKE THAT, STUPID CHICKENS!

The shout was followed by the revving of a small engine and a lot of squawking.  Annabeth sighed as Percy glanced at us.

Percy: You think-

YN: Oh, yeah.

We ran towards the sounds.  The next block over, we found a big open parking lot with tree lined sidewalks and rows of food trucks facing the streets on all four sides.  Percy had seen food trucks before, but never so many in one place.  Some were simple white metal boxes on wheels, with awnings and serving counters.  Others were painted blue or purple or polka dotted, with big banners out front and colorful menu boards and tables like do it yourself sidewalk cafés.  One advertised Korean Brazilian fusion tacos, which sounded like some kind of top secret radioactive cuisine.  Another offered sushi on a stick.  A third was selling deep fried ice cream sandwiches.  The smell was amazing, dozens of different kitchens cooking at once.  My stomach rumbled.  Most of the food carts were open for business, but there was hardly anyone around.  Unfortunately, there was more happening than just cooking.  In the center of the lot, behind all the food trucks, an old man in a bathrobe was running around with a weed whacker, screaming at a flock of bird ladies who were trying to steal food off a picnic table.

Annabeth: Harpies.  Which means-

YN: That's gotta be him.

We ran across the street and squeezed between the Korean Brazilian truck and a Chinese egg roll burrito vendor. The backs of the food trucks weren't nearly as appetizing as the fronts. They were cluttered with stacks of plastic buckets, overflowing garbage cans, and makeshift clotheslines hung with wet aprons and towels. The parking lot itself was nothing but a square of cracked asphalt, marbled with weeds. In the middle was a picnic table piled high with food from all the different trucks. The guy in the bathrobe was old and fat. He was mostly bald, with scars across his forehead and a rim of stringy white hair. His bathrobe was spattered with ketchup, and he kept stumbling around in fuzzy pink bunny slippers, swinging his gas powered weed whacker at the half dozen harpies who were hovering over his picnic table. He was clearly blind. His eyes were milky white, and usually he missed the harpies by a lot, but he was still doing a pretty good job fending them off.

Phineas: Back, dirty chickens!

I hadn't seen the roman breed of Harpies, but I'm pretty sure harpies are supposed to be plump.  These looked like they were starving.  Their human faces had sunken eyes and hollow cheeks.  Their bodies were covered in molting feathers, and their wings were tipped with tiny, shriveled hands.  They wore ragged burlap sacks for dresses.  As they dove for the food, they seemed more desperate than angry.  I felt sorry for them.  The old man swung his weed whacker.  He grazed one of the harpies' wings.  The harpy yelped in pain and fluttered off, dropping yellow feathers as she flew.  Another harpy circled higher than the rest.  She looked younger and smaller than the others, with bright red feathers.  She watched carefully for an opening, and when the old man's back was turned she made a wild dive for the table.  She grabbed a burrito in her clawed feet, but before she could escape, the blind man swung his weed whacker and smacked her in the back so hard that we all winced.  The harpy yelped, dropped the burrito and flew off.  I don't know why, but I ran after her.  I heard Percy yell at the old man behind me.