Crumbling Walls | Erwin Smith x Reader 18+

Epilogue

Boots sinking into snow, the skirt of your velvet dress already had a damp ring around the hem when you knelt down. Your palm met a freezing stone as you began wiping away. Again and again. Until your hand is left numbed and reddened. And, finally, those letters stared back at you in the clearing.

A simple name, and two dates. Birth and death. One of them was more significant than the other. Your eyes stare at them unblinkingly until they become glassy, and you force yourself to believe it's because of the cold. The subtle cool breeze that swooshed from your right. Kissed your pink cheeks and what had left of that burning inside your chest; once a blazing fire, now no more than cinders about to ash and blow with the wind.

"I'm happy." You whisper and feel the corners of your lips tug up. The stone of your brother's grave answers you with nothing more than that same cold silence. "I've been happy for a while..." You sniffle and feel the glide of the first tear, a cold trail over your cheek against the air. "Or so I believe. I've never known what it was like." You bite back a dry laugh. "You and me both never knew happiness..."

It's been three months since that night Erwin had came to your place. Three months of figuring out your life together after... everything. It wasn't easy for the both of you. But you had to push through it. The guilt, the pain, the demons that come crawling at night. But the most important thing was you both had each other. And so, things maybe still haven't gotten that easy, but they certainly weren't as hard as they were before when you were alone.

Because he's with me...

"I feel like I should apologize for breaking what I vowed to you." You sniffle again, then shake your head to yourself. "But I don't think you'd want it. I don't think you need it..." Your eyes lift up and stare into the distance at front. Past the many headstones buried under snow and past the iron gates of the graveyard. Precisely at that broad and dark shadow, standing near two horses and a carriage. Waiting. "Because I think... what started in death shouldn't end in death."

And then you smile as you keep staring at him, then lower your eyes to the cold stone again. "I miss you, brother, and I love you." You wipe another tear that slid down. "But you don't have to worry about me anymore. I'm doing good now. I'm... free." Of the past, of wrong choices and old mistakes. Grudges and those sharp and dark clutches of hatred. "Still between these walls, unfortunately." You roll your eyes. "But you know what I mean."

You glance up once again to see that shadow pacing now. Looking directly at you and you smile through the mist and fog separating you both. "I will come visit again once the snow melts. For now, I have to go." You swipe your palm over the stone in another gentle caress. "He's been dying to show me something..."

Then you get up. Dusting snow from your dress and boots. The frigid air sneaks up into your bones in another icy breeze as you make your way out of the cemetery in the outskirts of Wall Rose. Near your old village and where you used to live many years ago. Where a small town thrived, now nothing more than a deserted rubble of woods and stones.

A ghost of what life used to be...

"Are you cold?" Is the first thing he says when you approach him. His eyes taking in the glistening stains over your cheeks and the red nose as you shake your head in answer. And Erwin makes no other response; except the softening in his blue eyes and the tight tug he makes over your fur-lined cloak to warm you up. Because he already knows how much this trip means to you and what part of your soul is lying there under the ground.

You smile, then reach for his fancy brown coat and snake your arms under his, palms over his shoulder blades, you bury your face into his chest and hold him. Silently. As if making sure he's still here with you. Alive and well and so familiar. Another part of your soul that's still breathing and his heart still beating loudly in your ear.