A Silent Observer (Deku Angst)

Question & No Answers

  (A/n: have another long chapter for your aching hearts, it's gonna get kinda depressing though and packs in almost at once so fair warning)

  Even though Aizawa and Mic had adopted me they really couldn't take me in quite yet. Something about a one bedroom apartment cause Mic tried cooking and burnt their house down? Or something like that. For now I was staying in a small cabin in the forest that UA owned. Apparently it was for the staff and other heroes to lay low if needed. It was a one bedroom cabin with a kitchen that was also like a living room, restroom and some sort of storage basement...bunker. The cabin itself was probably only a 5-10 minute walk from the school itself so that was nice.

I was currently just sitting on the sofa reading the group chat. I was honestly kinda bored, Nezu apparently had taken me out of school once they found out how shit the school actually was. But hey at least kacchan would be happier without me there!
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Dadzawa: Tell Mic that he can't cook us breakfast!

FudMaster: Oh gosh

Allmight: what's so bad about present mic wanting to cook?

Midnight: Cause he burnt their house down last time.

Allmight: o-o

Papa Mic: oh come on guys! It was an accident!

Nezu: Mic no.

Papa Mic: ;-;

Little Angel: Rip mic

Sniper: wait why are mic and Sho still home? Doesn't classes start soon.

Dadzawa: ...

Papa Mic: cause SOMEONE didn't want to wake up.

Little Angel: off topic,can I take off my ring for a moment? My finger itches

Recovery girl: no! You can adjust it though.

Little Angel: ;-; fine.

Recovery girl: ok well people get ready for an false notification

Most everyone: 👍

Sniper: Hey at least he gave us the heads up, imagine not looking at the group chat and randomly seeing the notification that his heart rate is going crazy.

Bomb: Ya.... totally imagine

Sniper: you just panickly picked up your phone to type in the group chat didn't you...

Bomb: maybe....

Papa Mic: pfft, even though Aizawa knew the alert still startled him

Little Angel: oh sorry! Good news my fingers doesn't itch anymore though

Midnight: Nice!
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After a bit more of texting I got a knock at my door. I slowly got up and opened it to see Nezu and Aizawa there. I guess he didn't live to far away if he got ready and to the campus in like 30 minutes. Aizawa was holding some boxes. I stepped out of the way for the two to be able to get into the cabin.

"Hey problem child, got your stuff from your apartment" The Raven hair man said setting the boxes down.

"Oh thanks" I said kneeling down to look into the boxes. One was filled with clothes and stuff like that, the other was filled with my notebooks.

"I've got to say very impressive notes you got there Izuku" Nezu said. I looked at him and blinked, he went through my notebooks.

"Ah...there's nothing much" I said looking to the side. Most the important things about the heros that I observed were in code. The simple stuff that anyone could find by a quick Google search though weren't.

"Nothing much? Those notes were quite detailed, and you were smart enough to make it were not anyone could get their hands on it and read it, HAHAHAHA it took me a few days to decode them myself! Hahahahahaha!!!" He kept laughing and I slowly hid behind Eraser.

"Is this normal?" I asked him in a whisper.

"Sadly, it could be worse though." He sighed.

After a minute it had calmed down into a slightly awkward silence. There was clearly something else that needed to be discussed. If the grumpy cat had in fact snipped through my apartment he probably found some, unnevering things that I had hidden in my room.

"Izu....when I saved you for a third time there was a boy there, who was he?" Eraser asked. I froze up, I had expected him to ask anything but that. Where was he going with this?

"A...friend" I muttered.

"If he was your friend he would have tried to save you, plus you had burns all over you wouldn't a friend protect you from it"

I just stood up and sat on the sofa instead.

"Kacchan is my friend! Yes he is mean sometimes but still!"

"Is Kacchan the boy's name?"

"Nope!...and I'm not going to give it to you" I huffed crossing my arms. I could hear Aizawa sigh under his breath.

"Fine, but who wrote those notes? Can you at least tell me that?" He asked me. So he did go snooping. The notes weren't anything special just the run of the mill, go kys notes. I also put some pressed spider lilies in the drawer I kept the notes in. Spider lilies could kill me! But how would I get my hands on some?

"Kids in my class" is all I answered. Though those kids put me through hell no way I was calling them out. Unlike me they have a bright future ahead.

Nezu finally chimes in. "I see, you're protecting everyone. But why? Is it cause everyone in your class is applying to one of the many hero schools?" I just gave a small nod.

"And you know that we can't prove any of them did anything so we can't do anything...smart" Nezu finished his thoughts before looking at Aizawa. He didn't look to happy that the rat figure it out before he could.

"Izuku one last question" Eraser asked turning to face me once more.

"Mh?" I hummed in response.

"Do you still want to become a hero?"

I shook my head no. "Not really, I did but after everything not really...if I do keep on living I know I want to help the heroes in some way though....just probably from the sidelines, you know where a quirkless nobody can't get in the way of the actual hero work!"  I kept a bright smile on my face while I said this. It's true though I had completely given up on the idea of actually becoming a hero.

Something in what I said clearly broke the two heroes in front of me. I could see it in their eyes. It wasn't pity, just sadness.

"Midoriya, I guess we can discuss this later, school is starting soon and we should get to campus" Nezu said after a moment of pure silence before leaving. Aizawa looked conflicted not wanting to leave but after a while left after realizing that he was already late enough.

I just stayed on the sofa for a bit before pulling out my phone.
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Private Chat:

Deku: Hey kacchan!

Kacchan : oh great your alive

Deku: ...yes

Kacchan : what do you want Deku

Deku: Ah sorry to bother you! I know you're probably in class!

Kacchan : Get to the point!

Deku: oh I just wanted to check in on you!

Kacchan: I'm fine nerd! If that's all I'm going! Some of us actually bother to show up to class.
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What else did I expect from him. I honestly did have a question for him but didn't want to bother him to much. That's all I was a bother, to kacchan, to the heroes, my own mother. How long till Aizawa and the others abandon me too.

Soon enough tears started filling my eyes. They soon started pouring. I always was a crybaby wasn't I? After a bit of crying I finally got up from the couch. I slowly made my way to my bedroom, where I just plopped onto the bed. I don't remember when but I ended up falling asleep from exhaustion.

(A/N: Suffer =} )