Turning Back(Sequel to: Turned Upside Down)

let us scream

Dear Amy.

Umm. We went to see Chris yesterday, we being James and I. I don't know what came over me...it was like when you were younger and make a memory and when you're older you see something that triggers that memory. Well that happened and the trigger wasn't Chris himself, it was his eyes, the eyes that I saw every day when he would beat the life out of me, he would steal my completed homework, eat my lunch, everything. I saw those sunken eyes and I remembered everything he did and the last one was him paying on top of you. I yelled at him and he had to sit there and listen.
[Flashback]

"Do you have anything you would like to say to Chris?" A doctor asks me.

I nod and start talking. "Did you accomplish anything? Do you think that would have made you better? I ask you why, why did you try to rape her!?"

He looks down then flashes his eyes at me and then at James. "Who's he?"

"It doesn't matter who he is! Answer the question!" I slam my hand on the table.

"I don't know"

"Answer me!" I yell through gritted teeth, I see him flinch and tighten his jaw.

"I wanted to be like you! You were so kind and had so many friends I couldn't stand it!" He pulls on his cuffs as he talks.

"Well guess what?! You had nothing to begin with! You had fake friends! Fake love! And best of all, fake popularity!"

He looks up at me and opens and closes his mouth deciding what to say. "You had such a good life"

"Good!?" I chuckle at his words. "I had a crap life! I can only thank one person for all of the bloody noses, pranks that ended with me either covered in something or being hit, the stolen lunches, the teasing during PE, the fact that I was the school outcast! All of these a plenty more were caused by one person!"

He looks at me vaguely as I yelled at him. "Who?"

"You! You caused all of that! You were the biggest bully around!" He goes to interrupt me but I hit the table again. "No! You don't get to speak! It's finally my turn to tell you how you made school for me! You made me cry every day! You made me have no friends! I had no one! I was miserable, I dreaded school to the point that I would hide in the bathrooms until class! I would dodge you wherever you went! Until one day I decided to build a wall. A strong wall that no one could get through, I never let anyone in again and I thank you and only you for that. Sure Lauren told you all of my secrets and that gave you a huge advantage but you! You used all of those secrets against me and to your advantage! So now I ask you, was it worth it? Look at you, locked away and I'm the one who gets to leave this place. Was. It. Worth. It?"

"No"

"I don't wish this on you but I hope now you can know what you did" I start to turn around to leave when he shifts and I turn back quickly.

"You deserved it! You had no life! You deserved every thing that happened! Amy deser-"

"Shut up!" I scream.

"She deserved everything that happened!"

"Jackson, don't" James says from across the room as I move a foot. Suddenly I'm standing right next to him and my fist collides with his face, I feel his nose break under my fingers. The officers grab my arms and start to carry me out. "I hope you rot in here!" I scream as the door shuts.

[End of flash back]

So that happened and my fingers are really bruised. I don't really know what he meant by he wanted what I had? It's like he doesn't even remember. I gotta go. James is calling me down for dinner!
I miss you, -Jackson.

I run down stairs and sit at the table, James made chicken wraps and salad. We eat in silence until James speaks up.

"So, wanna watch something?" I nod and we finish dinner, we sit on the couch and flick through our movies until we find one to watch.

"James" I say quietly.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks" Gestures for me to move over to him and he pulls me into a bear hug.

"That's what I'm here for" He says patting my back. He lets me go and presses play on Guardians of the Galaxy.

I fall asleep half way through it thinking about what's happening. Why am I feeling this broken?