OVER AND OVER, Carl Grimes - BOOK ONE

ix. THE MEMORIES THAT HAUNT

- THE MEMORIES THAT HAUNT -

ੈ✩‧₊˚

NOW PLAYING: Sing For Absolution
By Muse

♫ Lips are turning blue
A kiss that can't renew
I only dream of you, my beautiful
Tiptoe to your room
(Tiptoe to your room)
A starlight in the gloom
(A starlight in the gloom)
And you never knew
(And you never knew)
Sing for absolution
And falling from your grace, ooh
There's nowhere left to hide
And no one to confide
The truth burns deep inside and will never die
Lips are turning blue
(Lips are turning blue)
A kiss that can't renew
(A kiss that can't renew)
I only dream of you
(I only dream of you)
My beautiful
(My beautiful)
Sing for absolution
I will be singing
And falling from your grace, hey
Sing for absolution
I will be singing
And falling from your grace, yeah
Our wrongs remain unrectified
And our souls won't be exhumed ♫

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ A MONTH has passed now since Connor had passed away. Evin wasn't doing good about his loss. He completely shut down from everyone. He hasn't been eating as much as he should and it's really starting to show. Evin has lost count on all the sleepless nights he has had over the past month.

Every time Evin closed his eyes all he could see is Connor. All he could hear was Connor's sobs and cries. His begs for Evin to shoot him. His last words repeating over and over again in Evin's mind. It was haunting him. Evin couldn't get away from it. Like the memories were taunting him, not letting him go from their evil grasp.

The sickening memories mocked Evin in his wake. Connor's cries echoed over and over again, repeating itself in Evin's head like a broke radio. It tormented his life. It's been tormenting his life for a month. Constantly. Evin so desperately wanted to find an off switch to all of this, but there was none. He would search aimlessly in the blackness of his heart for the switch but he couldn't find it. The tormenting never stopped. The voices in his head made Evin feel like he was going crazy. Maybe he was going crazy. Evin wouldn't know.

Evin would often catch himself staring blankly at the wall for hours and hours on end. Not doing anything but staring. The cries screaming at him at every hour of the day. Connor's words echoing at him but it wasn't his voice. It was a different voice. A voice Evin didn't recognise. The boy just wanted it all to end. His suffering, his pain, his hurt. The memories. Evin just wanted everything to stop.

Evin felt like he was going insane. He knew how worried his family were. Everyone has noticed how much he had changed. Evin has noticed. But can you blame him? After having to shoot your best friend in the head would definitely take a number out on you. Evin knew he would never be the same after that.

It's been a month yet he can still remember everything. Every little detail of the night. Everything that happened. Everything that was said, Evin can remember. All of it. Evin can see remember that broken feeling in his chest when looking down at his friend's arm. Seeing that bite mark. That single yet horrid bite mark, knowing that was the end. The end of his best friend.

Evin remembered the crushing feeling in his heart making it feel like he can't breathe when raising his gun at Connor. His last words. And then the loud bang. Then the silence. The defending silence that Evin never wants to hear again. Evin could remember the feeling in his throat. Like someone was ripping it out as he let out his own chocked sobs. Everything was so clear. Like it was yesterday.