Living through Lenses

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty

The cancer had finally started making appearances on my life. Almost like blotches of grey on a colourful painting or scrapes off a painted wall. Sometimes the pain in my head was so strong I couldn’t move, I couldn’t breathe, and in fact I was so scared that I would become paralysed. I was surprised and I kept asking myself, am I scared to die and each time the answer was no. But maybe I thought to myself, maybe I was scared it was going to be a painful death.

My mum visited less and less now, she was scared as well. Scared to see the truth of what was going to happen. Ethan, on the other hand, kept his promise and visited everyday. I don’t know how though, with school and him living in the next town. And everyday I was falling more and more in love with him. And everyday he was smiling more and more to cover up the pain. Sometimes the nurse would pretend she couldn’t see him and let him stay after visiting hours. It was sweet.

We would lie in my bed, in my prison cell and dream together. We would imagine all the different things in the world we could do.

‘Wouldn’t it be nice if we had our own private beach?’ I started.

‘And there would be no one to disturb us. And we’d have a tree house.’

‘And we’d stay up there for hours.’

‘And we’d go swimming.’

‘With the dolphins.’ I added.

‘And we’d catch fish.’ He managed a chuckle. ‘Maybe.’

‘And we’d watch the stars.’ I felt his grip tighten around my waist.

‘And we’d stay like this forever.’ He finished and we both knew that’s as far as it went.

He would leave probably after I fell asleep but I would wake up every morning with a note left on the second pillow I had, something new written on it every morning. Each week would fly by and before we knew it I had only three weeks left. The first day of the last three weeks I had lost all my hair, I didn’t know what to do. I tried putting a wig on but it was too itchy. I tried hats, beanies, but they didn’t hide the truth.

Before Ethan came I put a wig on. I would resist the itchiness and leave it.

‘Hey.’ I said, smiling. He didn’t reply, instead he walked right up to me and kissed me. Right on the lips, so deep and passionate yet so careful, like I could break.

‘You’re beautiful.’ He whispered and slid off my wig. Subconsciously I reached for it but he held my hand and repeated the two words over and over again. I couldn’t help it and I started crying. And at that moment he stopped but he didn’t ask, he just held me in a tight hug. No words needed.

My mum visited today. She came with my dad, looking at me like I was a complete stranger, of course until she started touching my head and crying.

‘I’m sorry.’ I said to her but my dad replied.

‘You shouldn’t be sorry. Even the strongest people have their weak days. And you have to be one of the strongest people I know. Next time, I hope you’re my daughter again.’ My mum’s sniffs became louder.

‘I hope so too.’ I replied to him.

‘I love you Kay.’ My mum whispered. At first I was shocked.

‘I love you mum.’ I managed but we didn’t hug, no more words, she just left after that.

Everyday from the second day of the last three weeks, Ethan started leaving me a little piece of a jewel next to his note. They were beautiful, shiny and all different colours. Only god would know where he got them from but I loved them so much I got a little box and put them all in there. And everyday my collection grew, and slowly, it became a whole big pile.

‘Ethan what are you planning to do with those jewels?’ I asked.

‘Oh you’ll want to wait and see.’ He chuckled.

So I waited and by the end of the second week of the last three weeks of my life, I was barely whispering. I was in so much pain constantly that I had to remember to breath. And that was when my waiting was up.

It was Sunday and Ethan came in holding a large, black-leather book. On the front of it there were some carvings but it looked like it was missing something. That’s when it clicked. The jewels were like puzzle pieces and fit into the little carvings on the book.

‘Ethan, thank you.’ I smiled.

‘Not yet, don’t thank me yet.’

Together we slowly pieced each piece of jewel onto the cover of the black book. It spelt out ‘LIFE’ and under it, carved into the leather, it said ‘of Kayla Frost’.

‘Go on, open it.’ Ethan whispered and so I did.

It was indescribable, the feeling I had, looking through all those memories. There was a photo of Faye and I at the beach and we had thrown our ice cream at each other, and then run into the ocean to wash it off.

‘Where did you get all these?’

‘Places.’ He smiled, a genuine smile.

‘Thank you.’ He kissed me on the cheek.

‘Keep turning.’ So I did.

The pages got more and more crammed with photos because there were more of the present then the past. And then there was a blank page, and a page that said ‘We love you, Kay.’ Then there were whole five or six pages filled with signatures and teeny little messages for me. I ran my fingers over them and I couldn’t help but smile. I turned the page again and found a whole page dedicated to Faye, her message, her writing and her love to me. I turned the page again and a blank was followed by ‘I love you, the most.’ I turned the page again to the very last two pages.

I held my breath because the sight it was breath taking. It was a picture, painted with watercolours. Of a girl and a boy sitting on the edge of a cliff over looking a beach. There was a tree and a tree house and evening stars had appeared. There was a dolphin coming out of the water and in the corner in the little words it said ‘Forever, Ethan.’ And then the tears really started flowing. 

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Yes sadly this story is coming to an end very soon :( please vomment.