Make it better- Pedri Gonzalez

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"Why don't you do anything all day the place is a fucking mess" Pedri raged 

"I've been at work I haven't been here to clean you've been here all morning why didn't you do it" I snapped back 

"Because it's your job plus I had things to do" he said 

"I'm not your housewife Pedri I'm your girlfriend and I have other responsibilities in my life so you have to help out around the house sometimes too" I said 

"I don't even know why you are bothering with work you don't even make any money" Pedri laughed sarcastically 

"Just because I don't make football money doesn't mean I make no money you know what I'm done with this argument I'll clean and make dinner" I gave in yet again 

~~~~~~~~~~

"Where have you been?" Pedri asked 

"Out with friends like I told you I would be" I said 

"But you were supposed to drive me to physio I can't drive remember" he said 

"You never asked me I told you where I was going and when I'd be back and you didn't say anything you didn't even text me to come back" I argued 

"Didn't think I needed to ask my girlfriend to take care of me when I'm injured" Pedri said rolling his eyes 

"You do when I have plans" I said 

"Well you are taking me tomorrow morning and you'll need to wait for me to finish to drive me home" he said 

"Oh yes of course your royal highness I'll be waiting at your beckoned call" I said sarcastically walking away from him 

"No need to be a bitch" he yelled from behind me 

~~~~~~~~~~

"God I can't take it anymore" Pedri yelled 

"I'm sorry I'm trying my best to understand what you're going through and help you but it's not easy" I said 

"Yeah no shit you don't understand or you wouldn't be annoying me so much everyday" he argued 

"I'm sorry I'm trying" I said 

"Well clearly not hard enough fucking idiot" he said whispering the last part but still loud enough for me to hear it 

That was enough for me I had nothing else to say so I took myself out of the situation and locked myself in our bedroom until I heard Pedri leave. In the time I was just sat in our bedroom waiting for him to leave I was thinking about what I wanted to do and I decided that I have to get out of here. I moved in with Pedri two months ago and it's not been good from the start but I'm lucky that I hadn't got round to selling my apartment yet so I found the keys from where I put them and packed a bag with as much stuff as I could fit, left a note for Pedri and just drove back there. When I opened the door the place felt so silent and empty but that felt good after the months of constant yelling and arguing while living with Pedri. 

This whole situation is so hard as I love Pedri a lot and usually he's such an amazing boyfriend but the last two months he hasn't been himself. Just before I moved in with him he got injured again and injures is something he's been struggling with for the last few years but each time he gets injured again it seems to affect him more. I tried my hardest to put myself in his shoes and understand that he's going through a lot and he's struggling mentally but he made it so difficult. Any time I tried to get him to open up he shut me out and when I stopped trying he just argued with me about the smallest of things which is why I just had to get out. 

What I had just done started to really sink in and I started to kind of regret it. I really love him and I never wanted to be with anyone else but now I've all but ruined it. Part of me wanted to just go straight back to his place and pretend I never ran away but the other part of me knew that I needed to do this as I can't let myself live like I have been. It hurts right now but I know I did the right thing this either ends with Pedri realising what he's done and making things right or he doesn't see what he did wrong and we break up which in that case would be for the best. 

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