When You're Bound To Love

Chapter 54

narrated**

It took both Lakhe and Sibu to successfully restrain Sandile and beg him back to himself. They struggled and pleaded until he calmed back to a still version of a shell. Lakhe: "Longer than the last time. We almost lost him." Sibu: "Should have let him kill her." Lakhe: "I wanted to Sibulele but we have to think this through. We're undetected for a reason. This Dez thing will go away and we will get back to our normal lives." they got in the car. Sibu: "Then he can get rid of her?" Lakhe: "Yes. He can take it to the last level."

SPHO**

I was sitting in the lounge with Rob and Dumisani. Lakhe and Sibu came in, with Sandile. His pants and shoes had mud on them and he didn't look very happy. My heart just ached. It wasn't his fault that he was like this. He didn't choose. Sibu: "Hello." Me: "Hey guys." I got up. I could tell Lakhe was pissed off. Lakhe: "We're going to take a bath." Sandile followed him to the bathroom. Me: "Can I talk to you?" Lakhe: "I have to make sure he's okay." Me: "I know. Do you need anything?" Lakhe: "Not yet." his jaw clenched and he left for the bedroom with Sandile. I felt butterflies in my tummy. Wait, butterflies. I froze in place. It wasn't the time. Sandile needed him. I was going to have to wait before I told him. I went to the kitchen to warm up their plates. Sibu: "What's wrong?" he followed me in the kitchen, watching me. Me: "Nothing." Something inside me kept saying 'TELL HIM'. But a bigger part said not yet. Sibu: "Okay. So I've placed mum in a center today. Thank you for finding out for me." Me: "Its a pleasure. Any news on da- your dad." Fuck. Sibu: "No... I've decided to give it a rest now. Police would contact me if they find a lead." Me: "Okay. So are you excited for your interview?" Sibu: "Yeah. It would be nice to get something to do." Me: "Sibu, are you okay?" he nodded. Something was off here. Why were his hands in his pockets the whole time? That was never a good sign. Me: "Here's your food." Sibu: "Thank you." Me: "So I guess you'll be back here now." Sibu: "Yeah. I was cleaning the house earlier. Making it nice. I'm thinking of renting it out." Me: "That's wonderful but where would your mom return to?" Sibu: "I'll buy her a house. Somewhere far from there." I swallowed hard. Something was definitely wrong. He wasn't even blinking. Why was I suddenly scared of this man? He's an angel. Me: "Great. I have to make a phone call. Please take this to Lakhe and Sands. I'll be in my room." I hurried out as quick as possible.

In my bedroom I got on the phone immediately with my mom. Hey where the hell was Nosi? I'd have to check on her. Have to Start drawing a schedule now, the family is getting bigger, I cannot lose one. Mama: "Hello angel." she answered. Me: "Hey mommy How are you?" Mama: "I'm fine, how are you?" Me: "I'm great ma. So...I have a problem." Mama: "What have you done now." Me: "Okay, why would you assume I did something mama?" Mama: "I'm sorry. What is the problem?" Me: "Mama, before you adopted me, the woman that I lived wit-" Mama: "Your biological mother." Me: "Well, Her. She happens to be Sibu's mother." Mama: "Wow. Really?" Me: "Yes." Mama: "So he's your brother." Why does she not sound surprised? Me: "Yes. But he doesn't know and I don't want to tell him." Mama: "Why?" Me: "I don't want it to be a whole thing. I'm scared. I've never had a brother. I don't want one right now-" Mama: "Honey, remember Mr Giggles." Me: "Of course. My puppy." Mama: "Remember how much you loved him?" Me: "I do. Then he got run over by a car and I can't do it ma. I don't want to." So maybe I have attachment issues. Mama: "Sibu is not getting run over by a car-" Me: "He was following me. I was walking to the shop. I left the gate open. And the car ran over him and I have crashed into Sibu's car almost killing him too. I can't let him near me. I'll obviously unintentionally kill hi-" Mama: "Spho, baby. Work with me. You can't avoid attachment with family because you're scared. These are things that are over powered by love. He has the right to know, you have the responsibility to tell him." Me: "You don't understand mama." Mama: "I know it hurts baby...and I don't mean the dog, I mean your childhood. You feel some sort of resentment that you had to grow up like that and he escaped it. He gets to reconnect with the healing version of your mother when you got all the trauma. I understand how you feel and its okay. Your brother isn't the one at fault." Me: "He's acting really weird now." Mama: "Well... Talk to him." Me: "It seems like I have to talk to everyone today. Where's dad?" Mama: "He's uhm...watching a rugby game at a friend's place." Me: "Oh ok. Bye mama. Love you." Mama: "I love you too baby." Me: "Oh and tomorrow, I'm taking you shopping. I found the best kitchenware shop in the country." Mama: "Oh no." Me: "Bye. Mwah!" I hung up. Lakhe walked in. Me: "Hey baby." Lakhe: "My love." Me: "You look really tired. Come here." he got in bed, holding me close. Lakhe: "He's getting worse. I need to look for options-" Me: "There are no options. He's loved and supported here. He came back. This is his safe space and he's going nowhere." Lakhe: "I don't know what I'd do without you. Without him. You've opened me up to a whole new world Spho." I felt the little butterflies again. Me: "I have a surprise for you." I took his hand and he touched my tummy. Lakhe: "What?" Me: "Wait for it." Lakhe: "She's.....she's kicking me. Is that her? That's my baby." Me: "Please don't cry." Lakhe: "I've been on standby all day. Just leave me alone." he kissed my stomach. Lakhe: "I don't know what's wrong with me baby, every time I hear about my baby or see her, I just tear up like a little girl." Me: "Just this once. Quietly." Lakhe: "Okay." he put his ear to my stomach. Lakhe: "Hey my angel.... I guess you're no longer a peanut now. You have little chubby legs. You can kick me. I hope you're not hurting your mom. Your uncle doesn't like that. He made me promise. So can you promise?" he lifted up his head. Lakhe: "Its like she's dancing in there. Can you feel?" Me: "She's inside me, of course I can." I laughed. Lakhe: "Let me spend time with my child." Me: "Go eat your food." Lakhe: "You're already trying to separate us." Me: "Go Eat." Lakhe: "Just so you know, if she was born I'd take her with me to the kitchen.." he walked out. I texted Nosi and asked where she was, her response was, I quote "Took your advice. Out on Date. C U L8r." Lakhe was gonna kill me. I replied: "WHEN is 'l8r'? Your brother is about to hold a search party!" She: "Shoot! I'll get an Uber quick. Plz stol him." What the fuck is stol......oh stall. Wow. What was so difficult in one more letter? And an a? Lakhe: "So....Sandile wants to talk to you." my breathing got stuck. Me: "What?" Lakhe: "He wants to talk. He's in his bedroom." Me: "Alone?" he gave me a sarcastic look. Me: "I'm sorry. I was kidding." I got up and went to his room. Knocking on the door. He opened it. Dressed in a navy silk gown. Sands: "Hi Spho." Me: "Hey you." I walked in. Sands: "So Lakhe told me, he told you what happened in the woods." Me: "Oh that?" Sands: "I'm sorry I upset you." Me: "Uh huh." Sands: "Its just that, its my job to fix problems that hurt my family. Lakhe's job is to protect us." Me: "Can I take over both those jobs-" Sands: "No. You won't do what needs to be done. Confrontation does not work on everyone." Me: "I hear you." All I was hearing was that, this isn't his last time. Me: "So I heated your food and its ready for you." Sands: "Thank you Spho." he hugged me. Me: "I'm just glad you're home. I hate not knowing where you are. You're part of this family and whether you like it or not. All of you are my kids." Sands: "I'm older than you." Me: "I don't care. You're still my baby boy. Okay? Don't worry me like this." Sands: "Okay." I let go. Me: "So....have you called Khanya?" Sands: "No. Why?" Me: "Sometimes its good to release some tension with a loving person." he smiled. Sands: "I hear you." he grabbed his phone. I walked out and sighed relief. That wasn't so bad. He was fine. For now. I went back to my bedroom.