Falling For Mikhaela Janna Jeminea Lim

Chapter 12: Smile

AIAH'S POV

I've been smiling from ear to ear simula nong usap namin ni Mikha kanina. She allowed me to be her friend, and remembering her smile makes me smile too.

Hindi ko alam na ganito pala ang epekto when someone who’s not really a smiley person smiles at me for the first time. Para tuloy akong tanga na kanina pa ngiti nang ngiti habang nag-aayos ng school works dito sa office.

"May lahi talaga kayong baliw, Ricalde, noh?"

"Huh? Ano na naman pinagsasabi mo, Vergara?"

"Tamo yang kaibigan mo, kahit tambak na ang gawain kanina pa nakangiti, ginawang clown yong gawain."

I'm too engrossed in the happenings between Mikha and me kanina to the point na hindi ko napansin na may dalawa pala akong kasama na todo bulungan na rinig na rinig ko naman.

"Wow ha, nagbubulungan pa kayo sa lagay na ‘yan?"

Tumigil ang dalawa at tumingin sa akin.

"Para ka kasing ewan d'yan teh, Ikaw lang nakangiti kahit tambak na yang ginagawa mo." Maloi stated.

I didn't bother to answer her and just focused on what I was doing.

Alam kong aasarin lang nila ako pag sinabi kong is because of Mikha. I've noticed this whole week, now that the eight of us are always hanging out together, that they constantly tease me about Mikha.

I don't mind at all, really.

I know biruan lang naman, and it doesn't bother me because I know I'm straight.

But I've seen how uncomfortable Mikha gets, and she often ends up getting annoyed and becoming even more withdrawn, ‘yong tahimik na nga mas lalo pang nanahimik.

I genuinely want to be friends with Mikha—like real friends, as in friends—but their constant teasing? hindi nakakatulong.

It’s frustrating because all I want is for Mikha to feel comfortable and open up a bit.

Instead, I feel like every time they tease us, she retreats further into her shell.

And honestly, that’s the last thing I want.

Ewan ko ba, but there's a part of me na rooting na makita s'yang paratawa o dumaldal nang dumaldal.

I know to myself na I'm an extrovert type, a social butterfly.

My parents are always busy, a typical business-minded people na mas maraming oras sa trabaho nila.

I'm not complaining naman dahil nagagawa ko lahat ng gusto ko without them telling me what to do or not, pero yung attention na gusto ko from them? I barely get it.

Kaya siguro dumating ako sa point na ganito, I love interacting with people, I want to get their attention and validation by simply acing my class, joining competitions, being a student leader.

I have so many acquaintances, pero si Stacey, Maloi, at Sheena lang talaga ang kinoconsider kong friends.

Sa kanila lang ako komportable, they’re like my sisters.

And they never failed to make me feel loved and validated, kaya while growing up, narealize ko na hindi ko need ng validation sa ibang tao, na I don't need to please them as long as I'm enjoying myself sa mga ginagawa ko at may mga tao na talagang nagmamahal at nag-aalaga sa akin.

Pero hindi pa rin nawawala yung pagiging friendly ko.

Pero hindi naman dumating sa punto na ipipilit ko ang sarili ko na makipagkaibigan sa taong ayaw naman makipagkaibigan.