What Are You Hiding, Roman Hart?

Surviving

"Who?"

"I'm Hope.", she said once more.

"Is this some kind of sick game my mom is playing?", I asked more to myself than to her.

"Listen kid, I know this is confusing and all, but we need to leave now if we have any chance of escaping.", she said.

In my mind, I knew it was probably not the smartest idea to go with some strange lady that's implying that she came back from the dead. But on the other hand, it was either back from the dead crazy or kidnap you and lock you away kind of crazy. I think I'll choose the first one.

"Okay, let's go!", I told her while running out the open back door.

She quickly caught up to me and guided me towards a parked car a little ways down from my house. As soon as the car was in sight, my heart skipped a beat with a feeling of joy circulating throughout my body.

I was finally free.

I started to run harder and faster to the car. When my hand touched the handle of the door, I practically flung it open and jumped inside the vehicle. "Hope" was quick to follow as she sat in the driver's seat at hurriedly put the car in park and sped away. She drove away so fast that I didn't have time to put on my seatbelt.

"Are you hurt?", she asked.

"No, I'm okay. What about you? I mean you're supposed to be dead and all.", I said.

She laughed and ignored my comment. "I've been watching the house for a couple of days and kept track of the times when the guards switch. I was worried they would hurt you if I got caught, but I'm glad everything went smoothly."

She was watching the house? I don't understand. How is she alive? Why was she watching me? Why did she save me?

"Why?", I asked.

She glanced at me in confusion. "What do you mean, why?"

"I don't understand how you're here right now. How did you know she was keeping my locked up? How did-"

"Woah woah, slow down kiddo. I'll explain everything later when we get somewhere safe. Just calm down for now.", she said.

"Can you at least explain how you knew that I was being locked up?", I asked confused by how she knew of the whole situation.

"Let's just say I've been watching for a long time."

I paused. A long time? Does that mean she saw what happened to Roman?

"Did...... you see Roman?", I asked.

"...... he's not dead.", she said.

"What do you mean he's not dead?"

"I know my son. He wouldn't die like that."

Anger bubbled inside of me at her words. I saw him die. Right in front of my eyes. I've been grieving for weeks, and I probably will be for the rest of my life. How could she just act like none of that happened?

"I saw him die with my own eyes.", I said.

"Don't believe everything you see kiddo."

Silence filled the vehicle as she sped down the road. I was done talking about this. I couldn't cling on to this false hope. My heart was screaming at me to believe, but I knew that if I did and it was wrong, my mind would crumble.

"I'm surprised you aren't stuttering. I've been watching you practically your whole life, and this is the first time I've heard you not stutter around someone you don't know.", she said while interrupting my thoughts.

She was right. I don't know why I wasn't stuttering around her. Usually I would be extremely nervous, but I'm unusually calm around her. Especially in the situation we are in.

"I don't know. You just feel....... familiar.", I said.

She didn't respond to my words, but I could see they had an effect on her. I turned to look out the window at the passing trees, wondering how my life became so messed up so fast. Honestly, I wouldn't care if my life stayed this way forever if I could just get one more hug from Roman.

My eyes started to tear up by thinking about him. I really didn't want to cry in front of his mom, at least I hope she really is his mom, because that would make things awkward.

"Where are we going?", I asked while trying to distract myself.

"I have a hidden bunker out in Serenity Woods.", she said.

Serenity Woods was on the outskirts of town. Most people avoided it because there were rumors of strange things happening there. You know, skin-walkers, ghost, Bigfoot. All of that crap. It's very ironic considering the place's name.

"Tom should be there since the safe house was compromised. We always planned to use it as a last resort.", she said.

"I thought he was killed because he wasn't at the house?", I asked her about Roman's dad.

"He most likely left before your mom's people could find him."

"Does he know that you're alive?"

"Yes.", she said.

"Why didn't you tell Roman?", I asked angrily

"I couldn't tell him because he was young at the time, and I was worried he wouldn't be able to keep it a secret. If he accidentally gave me away, my whole family could have died."

I understood her reasoning, but it didn't make me any less angry. Roman thought for years his own mother was dead, but really his parents were lying to him. Now he would never know the truth.

"This situation just keeps getting worse.", I mumbled to myself.

"Look, it's not like I didn't want to tell him. Do you know how many times I saw him and just wanted to run up to him and give him a hug? Do you know how it feels to watch your child grow up in front of your eyes, but you can't be there for him? I did what I had to do to keep him alive.", she said.

"Well you failed! Look where all of this has gotten him? Why did you have to work for my crazy mother? You could've given him a better life!", I said angrily.

"Don't you dare judge me! You have no idea what kind of life I've lived. You shouldn't even be complaining because if it wasn't for me, you would've never been born!"

"I don't care! I would rather have never been born if that meant Roman could have lived a normal life!"

The car grew quiet. I regretted lashing out like that, but I couldn't control my anger at the situation. If it wasn't for my mother, if it wasn't for me, Roman could still be alive. I don't deserve to be here, he does.

"We'll arrive at the bunker in an hour.", Hope said quietly.

I leaned back in my seat and continued to look out the window at the trees. Roman's smile popped into my head. His beautiful, wonderful smile that I'll never see again.

This is all because of my mother.

..... and me.

Why did I have to be born?