Love Me Again

Chapter 27

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Rahul stood in front of the bathroom mirror, staring at the small plastic stick in his trembling hand. The two bold lines on the pregnancy test stared back at him, unblinking, undeniable. He couldn't comprehend it. He had taken every precaution, every pill after each time they made love-how could this have happened?

His heart raced, a mix of fear and disbelief swirling in his chest. He had never planned for this, had never truly imagined himself as a parent, not now, not like this. The pills were supposed to prevent this very thing from happening. Yet here he was, holding proof of a new life he didn't know how to handle.

Before he could gather his thoughts, the door creaked open, and Hardik walked in, his eyes immediately locking onto the pregnancy test in Rahul's hand. A slow smile spread across Hardik's face, one of pure joy and excitement.

"Rahul..." Hardik's voice was filled with emotion as he stepped closer. "Are you... are we...?"

Rahul felt his throat tighten, the words sticking to the back of his tongue. He knew how much Hardik wanted this, how deeply his husband yearned to be a father. But all Rahul could feel was an overwhelming sense of dread.

Hardik reached out, gently taking Rahul's hand and the test with it. "This is amazing news, Rahul," he said, his voice soft and filled with happiness. "We're going to be parents."

But instead of sharing in Hardik's joy, Rahul pulled his hand away, his eyes filled with confusion and fear. "No, Hardik, it's not amazing," he blurted out, his voice trembling. "I... I don't want this baby."

The words hung in the air like a lead weight, and Hardik's expression shifted from joy to shock. "What do you mean you don't want the baby?" he asked, his voice laced with confusion and a touch of anger.

Rahul's hands shook as he placed the test on the bathroom counter. "I wasn't ready for this," he admitted, his voice cracking under the pressure. "I took the pills to make sure it wouldn't happen. I can't... I'm not ready to be a parent, Hardik."

Hardik's eyes narrowed, a flash of anger crossing his face as he tried to understand what Rahul was saying. "You took the pills?" he repeated, his voice growing firmer. "You deliberately tried to prevent this?"

Rahul's shoulders slumped as he nodded, the guilt weighing heavily on him. "Yes, I did. Because I was scared, Hardik. I didn't want to disappoint you, but I wasn't ready to have a baby. I'm still not."

Hardik's initial anger began to soften as he saw the fear in Rahul's eyes. He took a deep breath, steadying himself before responding. "Rahul, why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you talk to me about how you were feeling?"

Rahul turned away, his voice barely above a whisper. "Because I knew how much you wanted this. And I didn't want to be the one to take that away from you. But now... I don't know what to do."

Hardik reached out and gently turned Rahul to face him, his expression softening as he looked into his husband's eyes. "Rahul, I want to understand. But I need you to talk to me. Please, tell me why you're so afraid."

Tears welled up in Rahul's eyes as he struggled to find the words. "I've never felt ready for this, Hardik. My whole life, I've done what other people expected of me. I never got to make choices for myself. And now, the idea of becoming a parent... it terrifies me. I don't know if I can be a good father."

Hardik's heart ached as he listened to Rahul's fears, realizing how much pressure his husband had been under. He pulled Rahul into a gentle embrace, holding him close. "Rahul, you don't have to be perfect," he said softly. "We'll figure this out together, like we do with everything else. You're not alone in this."

Rahul clung to Hardik, his tears dampening his husband's shirt. "But what if I'm not good enough? What if I can't handle it?"

Hardik stroked Rahul's back, his voice filled with reassurance. "You will be, Rahul. I know you will. And I'll be right here with you every step of the way. We'll make mistakes, and we'll learn together. But we can do this."

Rahul pulled back slightly, looking into Hardik's eyes. "But what if I'm not ready? What if I never am?"

Hardik cupped Rahul's face in his hands, wiping away the tears with his thumbs. "Readiness isn't something that just happens, Rahul. It's something you grow into. And I believe in you. We'll take it one day at a time, and we'll get through this together."

Rahul nodded slowly, the fear still lingering but beginning to ease as he saw the love and determination in Hardik's eyes. "I'm scared, Hardik," he admitted once more.

"I know," Hardik replied, his voice gentle. "And that's okay. But you don't have to be scared alone. We're in this together, and we'll face whatever comes our way."

Rahul took a deep breath, the weight on his chest slowly lifting as he leaned into Hardik's embrace. For the first time since seeing the positive test, he began to feel the faintest glimmer of hope. Maybe, just maybe, they could make this work. And with Hardik by his side, he was willing to try.

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