Part.Of.Me. ~18+

Chapter 1

Ariala's POV:

I played with my hoodie as I sat with my best friend's Zia and Yuri at lunch, my legs kicking against the bench in front of me.

"Ow! Ari can you stop?" Yuri winced, holding her shin. Whoops.

"Sorry, I'm just thinking about-" 

"The Fall dance?" Zia said, interrupting me. I rolled my eyes and feigned a gag. 

"You know I'm not into that trash." I said, stuffing some mashed potatoes up my mouth.

Zia sighed and shook her head. " You're going to be single forever Ari. Besides, what's the point of you coming to school every day looking so gorgeous?"

"I'm not trying to be gorgeous! Besides, who would want to go to the dance with ME? The girl whose mom works at Starbucks?" I huffed, chewing some more mashed potatoes.

Don't get me wrong. I love my mom, and I don't care what job she works as. I just wished other people thought the same too.

"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm not going to the dance either." Yuri said, matter-of-factly. This would usually be a surprise, because Yuri's a total party psycho. She literally has a whole CALENDAR filled with possible party dates and ideas.

But Zia and I shared a glance as Yuri then went on to scrolling through her phone. I mouthed 'Talk to her'

Zia shook her head and mouthed back, 'No you! You know how sensitive Yuri is'

 'But I don't know anything about boys!' I emphasized, flailing my arms for emphasis.

She rolled her eyes in defeat, then cleared her throat and patted Yuri's shoulder. "Yuri? Um...so..I heard about you and Jake. Want to, er, talk about it?" 

I gave an enthusiastic nod. Yuri brushed her hair form her eyes, letting out a sigh. "We're over. I caught him kissing Kendra during seventh period."

"Wait- Seventh period math? We had an exam today!" Zia gasps. Zia was an "A" student. She always got the good grades, so the idea of kids skipping class was like a totally new idea for her.

"Yeah genius, he skipped class to go Frenchie a girl." I roll my eyes. Typical guys. I'm pretty sure that's why I have never met my dad before.

The school bell rang, and Lunch was over. "Whew, girls, we're almost over with the day. Tomorow is sleeping in and manicure." Yuri squealed, but I could tell she was just trying to get off the topic of Jake. 

"I was wondering if you guys wanted to visit my Lake House. It'll be fun, plus, my Abueal is taking us." Zia suggested as we placed out trays on top of the others. 

"Totally. You're Abuela is so cool. She literally lets us get whatever we want" I gushed. 

We laughed and talked and planned as we headed to the rest of our classes.

     ______________________________________________________________

 "I'm hoome!" I called out as I threw my bag on top of the couch, even though I knew Mom wasn't probably home anyway. 

I throw my body on top of the bag, relaxing for a minute.

"Haaaaaa" I sighed, stuffing my face into the cold leather. It feels good to be done with a long day.

I sat up, reaching for my phone, I scrolled mindlessly through my social media feed, trying to find something to pass the time. 

Images of friends laughing, couples gazing into each other's eyes, and perfectly posed selfies filled the screen. My thumb swiped down until I stumbled upon a group chat that some of the sophomore girls created. Without giving it a thought, I clicked on it. I wish I hadn't.

The messages flew by, and my heart sank as I read through the barrage of cruel comments aimed at different students—mostly freshman's. New messages were popping up like little firing bullets, each one more painful than the last.

"Oh, did you see Ari's outfit today? So last season."
"What's her mom think she's doing? Like, Starbucks doesn't impress anyone."
"She's so extra for someone so forgettable. The dance? LOL, as if anyone would take her."

I felt the phone slip from my fingers, hitting my lap with a soft thud. My stomach twisted, a mixture of embarrassment and anger boiling up inside me. It was like someone had punched me right in the gut. I thought I was beyond caring about what these people thought, but seeing the words laid out so starkly hit too close to home.

No, Ari. Don't think about them...please?

I needed a distraction, something to disrupt the way their crappy words were echoing in my mind. I gathered myself and picked up the remote slumping deeper into the couch. Tucking my legs underneath me, I grabbed the remote and flipped through the channels until I landed on a mindless romance movie—exactly what I needed to drown out my thoughts.

As the film played, I tried to immerse myself in the colorful scenes and all the kissing moments, like the other girls would. But I just couldn't. Each time someone kissed I closed my eyes in disgust and a little embarrassment.

Before long, I heard the familiar sound of the front door opening, then closing, followed by the shuffle of tired feet. It was Mom. I could always tell when she was home by the smell of her favorite lavender hand lotion wafting through the air.

"Hey, sweetie! I'm back," she called, her voice mixed with exhaustion.

"Hey, Mom!" I replied, forcing a smile to mask my true feelings.

Mom walked into the living room, her blonde hair slightly frizzy from the long day and the hint of bags under her eyes. But she still managed to smile at me, her tiredness melting away as she saw me on the couch.

"Did you have a good day?" she asked, her hands slipping into her pockets as she leaned against the doorframe, her playful glance lingering on the screen.

I shrugged, not quite sure how to answer without spilling everything about the messages. Instead, I just gestured to the movie. "Just watching this, trying to find something to pass the time."

"Ah, the classic 'girl who is secretly amazing and finds true love' kind of movie, huh?" she teased, plopping down next to me. "You know, these movies are not always realistic. Trust me, you'll find your own happiness, with or without the drama." 

I think she sensed something was up with me.

I chuckled lightly, appreciating her attempt to lighten the mood. But the burn of the words echoed in my head, and I couldn't help but think that perhaps that was what these films were doing—offering an escape from the reality that felt so harsh.

"I didn't want to think about today, really," I admitted quietly, staring blankly at the television, letting the colors wash over me. "But sometimes it feels like everyone is just waiting for me to fail."

Mom's expression shifted from playful to concerned, and she nudged my shoulder gently. "Ari, I need you to listen to me. People can be mean. They don't see how amazing you truly are, and that's their loss, not yours."

I wanted to believe her, I really did, but it was hard to shake off what could easily become a festering wound. "What if they never see?" I murmured, feeling the tears bite at the corners of my eyes.

"Then we ignore them. Their words don't hold power unless you give it to them," she said, her tone unwavering and confident. "Plus, anyone who really matters to you will always see how special you are. Just give it time, okay?"

I forced a smile. "Okay."