RUNNING WITH WOLVES remus lupin

O43. 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐍𝐎𝐖. . .

𝐅 𝐎 𝐔 𝐑 𝐓 𝐘 - 𝐓 𝐇 𝐑 𝐄 𝐄

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“SO HOW'S YOUR GIRL?” Sirius says as he and Remus head towards their portkey set up in the forbidden forest. Remus scowls, “Sirius, don't say that.” He continues along faster. Sirius lets out a low whistle in amusement.
“Oh, be serious Rem.” Sirius stops to chuckle at his choice of words. “A-Azkaban aside, years aside, I'm still your best friend, you can tell me.”

Remus scowls. “James is your best friend. And just because your back doesn't mean anything. I mean come on, we avoid each other as much as we can these days. So don't act like you know all about my life.” Attempting to avoid the conversation. Sirius gives a wounded look. Then he starts to catch up with him. He finally gets in Remus's way. To block his path. “Hey! Wait a minute!” Remus who's clearly now in a mood moves past him. Bumping his shoulder against Sirius’s.

“REMUS STOP!”

Remus who's a few steps away from the portkey slumps defeated and stops. But he doesn't turn around. “I don't know what's going on with you but this needs to be said. We were all best friends. All of us. Even Pettigrew.” He bristles after uttering the traitor's name.

But he pushes through. “Yes, James and I were closer than most. Because he was my brother. His family gave me a home when mine got bad. But that never negated you. You're my Moony. James would say the same I know it. Hell, even Lily would. I know it's not fair to any of us that so much time has passed. That James and I couldn't be there for you. But I'm here now. We live together for Merlin's sake! We're what's left of the Marauders. Yes, it's hard to trust each other but we have to learn to. For our sake, for Harry's sake. Hell, even for her sake. You heard Dumbledore.”

There's silence between the two men. Remus breaks the silence with a sigh. Rubbing his face looking worn out. “I'm sorry, Pads.” Before Sirius could say anything, Remus continued. “It's just hard to speak about her. Being away from her is terrible. I'm tired of being worried and anxious. I'm tired of Moony pushing for control, I'm just so tired of all of it I-”

Remus is rambling, looking worse for wear. Sirius cuts him off by walking up to him and pulling him in a tight hug. “You don't have to talk about her,” Sirius says, Remus still in his embrace. “I want to-” Remus tries but Sirius swiftly cuts him off. “No, don't force yourself to.” Sirius pulls away to look his friend in the eyes. “All I'm saying, Moony, is that you can't keep this bottled up. It'll make you crazy. For right now I just need you to know, you're not alone.”

Remus gives a small smile. Though still feeling conflicted. “Thanks Pads. Come on, let's not miss our portkey.” As they both walk to the portkey and grab a hold. He thinks back to Elodie. Over the conversation they had.

Elodie who had run up to him pushes him away. Her anger took over. “Why? Remus.” She says as she catches her arms around her. Remus is stunned as he begins to gape slightly. Taken aback at the force of her questions and hurt of her voice. He hasn’t seen his mate in weeks, and the weight of his absence bears down on him like a dark cloud.

The pain in her eyes is evident. She was truly hurt by the decision to distance himself to protect her from the danger he felt he could bring.

There are so many other things he could say. But all he could give her was, “You know why.” Elodie wished she could accept it. That she could bask in the fact that he's really here. But that's not her. His answer is not enough. “Really, Remus? Because I think you'll have to explain this to me. Months Remus, months I waited for an answer. You didn't even say goodbye. How is that supposed to make me feel?” She asks, now pacing. Before he could give her some flimsy excuse she continued. “I waited for you, hoping you would give me clarity or at least an explanation- so no, Remus, I don't know why.”

"I . . ." Care for you? Need you? No, keep it simple, Remus. Then, another thought struck him. One that just might work.

“I don't know much about mates, honestly I've never believed in them.” Elodie waits as Remus continues. “I don't even know much about werewolves other than the basic knowledge that they have in the books. This is a roll with it kinda of basis and it always has been for me.” For a while, there's silence between the two of them.

“I’m sorry,” he starts, his voice trembling with sincerity. “I never wanted to hurt you. I thought I was doing the right thing by leaving, by keeping you safe from the monster I become.” He pauses, his chest tightening with the weight of his remorse. “But in trying to protect you, I only ended up abandoning you when you needed me the most. I see that now, and I'm sorry to have caused you pain.”

“You left me with so many questions, Remus! How did you know I was your mate? Why wouldn't you be the one to tell me? Who's Moony and why does he know who I am?” Elodie rambles her arms crossed over her chest. Then there's silence between the two again.

Remus, though hesitant, decides to take a step closer, vulnerability etched on his face. “The moment I looked into your eyes you became my everything. The axis of my entire being shifted and suddenly you were the most important. But I don't want that for you, I've lived with this affliction for a long time. You shouldn't have to go with this because it's happening to me.”

She looks at him, her eyes gleaming with hurt and anger, “You can't decide that for me, Remus. That's not fair! You're off trying to deal with the struggle on your own. But we should be dealing with this together because I'm floundering and I don't know how to get up.”

Elodie's arms are wrapped around her and she paces in small circles in the courtyard. “Every day since it happened, my world has revolved around you. Everything is about you. I don't know anything about this. You know more than me and you left me behind without any word or any confirmation of anything! If it hadn't happened this way, who knows if we would have ever met later and it would. But it did and we have to deal with it because pretending that it's not happening is not going to do anything-”

Remus cuts her off running a hand through his hair, the gesture revealing his internal struggle. “I'm sorry Elodie!” There's silence between them and he hesitates but continues, “I care for you, more than I should,” he admits, his eyes searching hers. “I’ve tried to keep my distance, to protect you from the dangers of this, but it’s become impossible to ignore the bond we share.”

Elodie’s breath catches in her throat as his words sink in. “You mean… you feel it too?” She asks, hope and fear mingling in her voice. “Every day,” he replies, stepping closer. “I care for you deeply, Elodie. You’re my mate. This connection we have—it’s powerful and real, and I’ve been scared. Scared of what it means for both of us.”

Tears well in Elodie’s eyes as she takes a tentative step forward. “I’ve felt lost without you. I thought I was being foolish for wanting to be close to you, for wanting you to understand what this bond means to me.” Remus’s gaze softens, filled with understanding. “You’re not foolish. It’s a profound connection that goes beyond anything I’ve ever experienced. I thought I could protect you by keeping my distance, but all I’ve done is push you away.”

Elodie shakes her head, her resolve growing stronger. “I don’t want you to protect me from this. I want to share with them, to understand what it means to be your mate. I care about you too, Remus. I want to be on your side.”

“Then let’s face this together,” he says, his voice filled with conviction. “I care for you more than I can express, and I want to embrace what we have. I don’t want to be afraid anymore.” She reaches out, her hand trembling slightly as it finds him. Their fingers intertwine an unspoken promise forming between them. “Together,” she whispers, her heart swelling with hope.

Remus nods, a soft smile breaking through the tension. “Together.”

The memory fades and Remus can't help but hope it's enough for Elodie, for now.