Damaged Diamond.

Chapter 3

I wake up the next morning to someone singing so loud and so poorly that you feel like have nails going down a chalk board would sound so much more appealing. Reluctantly, I get up and start my day with the usual look in the mirror and complain that my hair is disruly, my hips are huge, my thighs are thick and my legs don’t have a gap between them. After a short period of time I realise that standing there won’t make the day end quicker.
So I motive myself to get into the shower and get myself ready for the day. Whilst I’m in there I can’t lie and say that I’m not excited for the day because I am. I’m so excited for the day and to be spending time with my mum, we don’t do this very often that’s probably my fault but I just hate shopping. I’m excited for the dresses we will find, but then also nervous as I hate trying clothes on. I just mentally prepare myself and remind myself to get a dress that’s not too tight, not too reliving, not shaped to my body..must get a big skirt dress as I don’t want my huge butt on show and them hips urgh. Don’t get a bright colour, must be a black or silver dress as that won’t show too much attention to myself. I must not get something that will make people look at me. My god how embarrassing if they all stared at me. You must stay invisible. My mind is constantly reminding me of this all and it makes me feel so crazy. The whole time I was in the shower I made a mantra that I must not choose the wrong dress, just a simple plain boring dress that will let me stay invisible.
After my half hour to 45 minutes shower and my mantra, I could hear my Mum calling me telling me we need to leave in half an hour. So, I climb out the shower and I tried to tame my unruly hair as much as I possibly could. I ended up throwing it up into a half up half down ponytail and some side pieces out to frame my face. I decided against makeup today as I couldn’t deal with it running down my face of I try on some many dresses and get too hot. I decided to wear just a flowy summer dress as it will be easier to change out of and my white Converse trainers to keep the outfit casual.
After looking in the mirror for a good 5 minutes wish my stomach was flatter, my thighs to be smaller and for my boobs to be just a bit smaller and for my skin to look just a bit more flawless. I decided to head down stairs and get this awful day over.
But then as walking down the stairs it just got worse, there was my brother is the kitchen scoffing down his cheerio’s while mum was humming to herself and dad was reading his morning news paper while drinking his coffee. My brother looked up and laughed as the sight of me. My mother turned at said that I looked lovely, while my dad gave my brother the death glare. I went to the fridge to get a bottle of water and then as I went to take a sip I could hear the intro to ‘I got big butt’s and you cant deny.’  For then my brother to be full on screaming it out and pointing at my butt. I went as bright red as a tomato and just stared at him. My mum giggled and my dad snatched the phone off him and turned the song off.
My brother then said ‘oh Belly, don’t look at me like that it was just a joke. ‘ while snatching his phone back from dad.
My mother could see that my dad was about to shout and quickly skipped over to us and said ‘Belly, Car come on. It’s time to leave.’ I looked at her in utter shock.
I then said ‘Nope, I’m not going dress shopping with him to make me fell even more embarrassed than I know I will already feel.’
Carlos just walked out the door to the car and my mum said ‘Don’t be silly we are dropping him off at football practise on the way to town.’
Oh thank god for that. I would rather shoot myself then have him watching me try on dresses as I know for a fact that her would take the mickey out of me and just make me more and more self conscious that I already am that’s if there is such a thing a minus self confidence.
I give dad a kiss on the cheek and he smiles up at me. I grab an apple from the fruit bowl and walk out to the car.

The car ride felt like it was taking forever. I sat in the back of the car staring out of the windows to see the beautiful blue sky and the flowers budding in the fields as we drive by. In a total day dream of a life that was not as complicated as mine and all sunshine and flowers and no real problems just like a fairy-tale but everyone knows fairy-tales don’t exist unfortunately. The drive doesn’t take long until Carlos is at his football practise he mutters goodbye and slams the door.
‘Get in the front darling, and then let’s get our shop to we drop attitude in place.’
I giggle at her, she is so goofy but so beautiful.

After I drop into the front passenger seat we head to town and it seems so quite for a Saturday afternoon. I could be doing something so much more important than dress shopping but then in reality this was important thanks to my two best friends who thought that prom was such a great thing and even better for me to be a nominee for prom queen. I can’t believe they did that. They think they are soo clever ill get the back. My mind wonders to the thought out me on a stage with stunning girls while I look all fat and frumpy. Great idea. Brilliant.
All the while my mum is rabbling on about the best sort of prom dress and the different types of them I kept droning out and hoping the dress was actually closed or closed down overnight. How ridiculous was my thought trail but then I realised there will be no escaping the inevitable as if it did mum would always head out of town to another shop. As we approached the town centre I kept reminding myself that I must get a dress that is plain and will keep me invisible.