pennywise is- complicated. also, sorry for lack of updates on this.
you loved your sister more than anything. you'd protect her against the world. if anything happened to her, you'd make sure that person would regret it, even if you aren't so intimidating. which is the truth, you're not.
you watch as grace plays in the playground. thankfully, pennywise isn't around to torment you. the people around you might think you're mentally unwell, but then again, they never give a shit about anything, you know this.
her sister smiles at you, and innocently waves. she's young. she still has that childish glimmer and innocence. you wished you were that age again. life seemed so much better when you were a child.
but then again, you also know that your childhood could've been better than it was. "(y/n), a voice said. it's beverly.
"oh hi, you say, surprised to see her around here. you don't think any of them would be near a playground. at your age, it seems child-ish to a lot of teenagers.
but maybe you were wrong then.
you're always wrong, you should just admit it. but, you're stubborn, so you won't right away. "didn't expect to see you here, beverly said, smiling.
"me too, i mean, i'm here for my sister, but yeah, you said awkwardly. "what are you here for? a boyfriend?"
she chuckled. "no. none of the guys are really mature, i suppose, if you count richie." "richie's definitely not! you tease, you cared about them all.
"oh he needs some growing up to do, bev joked." is that your sister?" you look over. "yes."
"you two look alike, she said."i wish i had a sister. i'm an only child." "i wish sometimes i was one, you laugh." it's not easy. but, she's young, so she's good to me, for now."
you had been an only child for a lot of your life, so, you knew how it felt like. unexpectedly, grace was born, and now, you were a older sister protecting and looking out for her.
you wanted to leave derry, though, of course.
nobody likes it here, and, in a way, the town's cursed. nobody can deny that. you think it is because of pennywise, he must've cursed it somehow, because it's just derry, history's proven that.
you've learned that pennywise was responsible for most of the horrid events that happened, indirectly, and directly, too. it's eerie, but nobody says anything about it.
they're all bystanders, and, it's probably something to do with being cursed.
you'd never believe in it if you hadn't seen pennywise, or the losers' club.
but then again, who would?
pennywise didn't seem to be real at all, whatsoever. you'd never guess that. but, you also suspected that your friendship and the losers overall, were different. that maybe the bond was strong enough, that was why he was so intimidated.
"earth to (y/n)?"
"oh, right, sorry, you laugh. "no worries, i zone out every single day, almost, she laughs. "well, it's kind of boring, being on my own, grace brings me comfort and that lack of boredom, you said.
"she seems very sweet, bev said. "keep her close, bill lost his brother." you nod, remembering georgie.
you still find that topic sensitive, too.
after the park, grace asked you, "was that girl your friend? her hair's pretty." "oh yes, she's my friend, you said."she mentioned you today."
"really? grace asked.
you nodded."yes. you're very sweet, that's what i told her. because you are. the sweetest girl i've ever met. i've met plenty of girls, too, so i know."
"my friends at school are sweet too!"
"i hope so, you said, ruffling her hair.
in your room, you play some music. you liked a few genres of music, but not country. the country music wasn't that good, in your opinion, especially for its time. country overall you weren't a fan.
they sounded the same to you, in your opinion.
you hum as you listen to music.
"mind turning it down a little, your mother asked.
you reply,"yes!"
your father hated the music you liked, mostly because it was 'vulgar', it wasn't. he was just too conservative. like most people in this time.
luckily, he hardly was home anymore. probably with a side chick of his, your mother probably thought so too.
still, why maintain a marriage then?
you wouldn't know, but it's ruining your idea of marriage, for sure. you have the urge to write, vent your feelings.
fuck you dad.
are you even a dad at all?
there was some darkness in you, something you hadn't expected when you had an thought of being violent.
you ignore the thought.
you hear a childish laughter, knowing it was pennywise's doing. of course, of course. "(y/n), i thought you were so good, the voice said.
not one of pennywise, but one that is him disguising his voice.
"i'd like to say i'm decent, you said. "but you? you're evil." "evil's such a strong word, the voice said.
he's human again.
you look up at him. he's scary, even as a human. it's those eyes. "hm, you said."you cn kill me, i'm vulnerable, and alone."
"your fear's so tasty, he said. "but, i'd like to savor my meal." the suicidal part of you is disappointed, the trauma and pain you have, which might be why pennywise keeps following you like some creep.
you may not be rid of him at all.
"why did you kill that guy? and be fucking serious for once, you said. "i needed a meal, he said creepily, looking at you.
you'd admit one thing, his human form was good-looking, but don't be fooled, it didn't mean anything. you can understand attractiveness, and not be attracted.
"leave me alone, or kill me, at the very least, you hiss.
he leaves, but you know he's not going to be gone for long. and why in a human form? wasn't his entire thing feeding on fear, preying on your emotions and shit?
fuck this.
you can't let this evil lurk around. there must be some shit that you can do, if it's the losers and some bond, then they'd surely help you.
you didn't know one thing, though.
how obsessed they were, watching you often.
today had been no exception, they had seen pennywise, and knew he must be gone.
they must kill him.
