The Captain's Heart

forty-seven

Trigger warning: Contains references of child abuse, suicidal thoughts, depression.

24th August 2022 - six months and twenty-seven days old.

She can't help but audibly gasp as the brunette opens the front door; her eyes red and puffy as a result of the tears she's shed over the past couple of days and her breathe reeking of the alcohol she's consumed.

'D-Don't.' Imogen mumbles shaking her head as she turns to make her way through to the living room causing her fellow Aussie to make her way into flat and closing the door behind her.

'What's going on, Imogen? This isn't a typical reaction to what happened with you and Leah the other night?' Steph asks softly as she makes her way over to where Imogen has wrapped herself up on a blanket on the sofa.

'I don't want to talk about it.' Imogen mumbles as Steph moves some of the empty wine bottles out the way and sits on the edge of the coffee table directly in front of the brunette.

'You're gonna need to talk to me about something, Imogen. This-' Steph begins gesturing to the brunette and the empty bottles.

'Isn't healthy... I can see that you are struggling with something and you don't even have to tell me what exactly it is that you're struggling with but I need to know how we can help you through this. I need to know how we get you to the other side of whatever is going on?' Steph says.

'I don't even care about the football anymore. The team can replace me, they don't need me.' Imogen replies shaking her head.

'This isn't about the team or the football, Imogen. This is about you and only you. I'm not worried about how the team will do, I'm just worried about you.' Steph says softly as she reaches for Imogen's hand as tears begin to stream down the brunette's cheeks.

'I don't want to do this anymore.' Imogen almost whispers.

'Do what?' Steph asks.

'Anything. I just- I thought I was over it. I thought I was okay but I'm not, I'm really not and I don't know if I'll ever be over it.' Imogen cries.

'Right, listen to me... It's okay to not be okay. Whatever has happened, whatever is going on in your life right now is clearly huge. You need to let us help you though. There are so many people who love you, who are worried about you.' Steph says and Imogen shakes her head.

'I'm not worth it. You're all just so much better off without me.' Imogen replies.

'Hey, no... Don't you dare say that, Imogen. That is just so far from the truth it's insane. My world is so much better with you in it.' Steph says gently squeezing the brunette's hand.

'What do you need? Do you need to go home for a bit, hmm? I can arrange for flights, speak to Jonas for you?' Steph asks.

'No.' Imogen replies, her eyes wide as she shakes her head.

'Okay... Okay, no going home that's fine. Will you come stay with me and Dean for a few nights? I don't want to leave you on your own when you're feeling like this?' Steph asks watching Imogen bite her lip.

'Okay.' Imogen almost whispers causing Steph to let out a breath she didn't even realise she was holding.

'Okay.' Steph repeats.

****

'Can I let Leah know that you're here and you're safe?' Steph asks cautiously as she glances at the brunette who is curled up on the sofa with Calvin on her lap.

'No. I don't think that's a good idea.' Imogen replies shaking her head.

'Okay, that's fine. It's totally up to you... What do you need right now? What do you need me to do to help you through this?' Steph asks.