Destined by Chance

Chapter 26

"It was a love marriage," Simi exclaimed.

Neil smiled sardonically.

"Yup it was," he agreed, "but somewhere along the line their individual interests became bigger than their relationship, their ideas on how they wanted to live their life or where they wanted to settle down, but those are my guesses, the last time I asked my father about it I had gotten a solid thrash, I was twelve that time, and I never asked again," he told her with a smile, "the problem is I don't think they have stopped loving each other," he said thoughtfully, "in all the years they have spent separated, neither of them have had another relationship. My mother had stopped talking to me when I had suggested to her she take a divorce and remarry if that was what she wanted. That way they have stayed true to each other but they don't stop from irritating or hurting each other either," he said and shrugged, "and I haven't been able to make any sense of this love hate relationship they share," he said and looked at her, "they are passionate about what they do hence their success, and they are passionate about each other too," he said and frowned, "I don't know how else to put it. Every time they meet it is like an explosion. They are so much into each other that anybody who would see them would think they are so in love but in a couple of days they are back to fighting like dogs and cats, hurling insults, casting aspersions and then go their own way," he said and dragged his hand through his hair as he put his head on the backrest of the couch, "and that has been their story since the time I can remember," he said on a sigh.

"And you were in a hostel since when?" Simi asked.

"Hmmm, since I was about six," Neil said heavily.

"And they never came to see you?" she asked gently.

"They did, they love me Simi, in their own weird way they do," he said as he glanced at her, "don't think otherwise and I went to see them every holiday as well but it's just...I don't know they weren't meant to be together but they did, they probably weren't meant to have a child I guess but they did," he said evenly.

"Don't say that Neil," Simi said as she turned her body towards him to have a better view of him, "you are a wonderful person. Such a warm human being and you do take your responsibilities seriously," she said.

"And how do you know that?" he asked wryly.

"Because if you didn't you wouldn't have come here to save the neck of your best friend you were so mad at," she pointed out, "you even took me in and helped me when you could have stayed away and minded your business. It wasn't your problem," she said quietly, "you are a caring person and I really think you should stop being so scared of commitments. Trust me, you will make a great partner," she told him.

"You really think so, after the weird history of my parents," he said as he raised his head and looked at her in surprise, "genes say a lot about a person.... girl and mine are really twisted. You are a sweet girl Simi but trust me, I know what I am talking about," he told her as he straightened and put his feet down, "okay for a second forget about my history okay, look at Robbie and Preet for instance. They were in love. So very much. So, what went wrong?" he asked.

"No two relationships are the same Neil, and it takes two to make a relationship but one to break it," she said trying to put her point across.

Neil heard the logic behind her argument, but he was unable to let go of his hang ups. She was right. No two relationships were the same. And it did take two to make it work. The effort had to be made by both individuals. One person could ruin it for sure but together any problem could be worked out. He somewhere understood what she was saying but he wasn't ready to put his trust into it. It didn't matter what she thought or what she had to say. He knew the truth. It hurt. He had been hurt when he couldn't meet his parents at the same house. He would spend one month with one and next month with the other. It didn't matter that they loved each other or didn't. He had been hurt when they hadn't been able to overcome their differences and come attend his milestones. He had been hurt when they hadn't been there every single time he had needed them. If one was there the other was significantly missing. Every time they had come together, he had witnesses the love and he had hoped but every single time his hopes had been dashed. Their egos were superior to their love. And, after sometime he had understood that this was the way it was always going to be. He had stopped expecting. Stopped asking. Stopped thinking. He hadn't known any better and so he had accepted it for what it was. Somewhere along the line he had come to believe that he couldn't have a relationship either. He would be the one to ruin it and it would hurt his partner. Just as much as it would hurt him. Nope he was better off away from them.

"Maybe," he said in a non-committal manner, "but I am not made for them. I know myself Simi and so I know I am not that material," he told her as he shook his head.

"You haven't even tried Neil," Simi said as she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, "you were the one who told me that this morning. How would I know till I tried and I did," she said as she sat up straighter, "look, I came out finding something really new about myself so if you try maybe you will find something new about yourself too. Treat it like an experiment," she said with a smile voicing his words.

And that made Neil smile.

"You are a sweetheart you know that," Neil said as he ruffled her hair a little, "but what if the experiment fails?" he asked.

"Well, you would know what not to do the next time," she said and shrugged grinning.

Neil laughed at that.

"You are something else you know that, my dad would love to meet you," he told her.

All Simi did was smile.

"So, you are willing to give it a try," she asked instead. A bit too hopefully.

"As much as I appreciate your thoughts Simi, the answer remains unchanged," Neil said firmly.

"You are really stubborn you know that," Simi said annoyed with him.

"Aren't you supposed to be big on patience," Neil asked in a teasing tone.

"Yes, for kids with special needs," Simi said sullenly, "not for grownups with good functioning brains," she told him as she rose from her seat, "if you are so hell bent on staying alone then who am I to stop you," she said and turned forgetting the length of her dress. It stuck between her feet and before she could detangle and find her balance she fell sideways and back on the couch against Neil.

"You okay," Neil said in alarm as he turned towards her.

He hadn't expected her to stand up so quickly. With the length of her dress she should have been more careful. Before he could even figure out what was happening she had fallen back on the couch, actually more against him than the cushioned back. It hadn't hurt him. But she seemed to be out of breath. As he turned and asked her she lifted her head and he helped her. Unwittingly his hand pushed her hair away from her face framing it.

"You okay Mouse," he asked slowly.

And she nodded her head. Her face suddenly too close to his. Her eyes looked startled by her fall but she didn't seem hurt in anyway. Her cheeks were flushed and her lips slightly parted. Neil's gaze slowly travelled down her face to those lips he had tasted tonight. His thumb flicked slightly over the bottom lip and he heard her gasp. He should move away. The last time he had kissed her he had had no option but this time he did. He needed to get away from her. Fast. He heard warning bells ring in his head. But his heart refused to pay any heed to it. All the reasons he had given himself as to why it was good to stay away from her suddenly lost their importance. He wanted to kiss her. No. He needed to kiss her just as he needed his next breath. He lowered his head and she met him halfway. Her soft moan chased away any resolve he might have had. He would hate himself in just another moment but he was okay with it.

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