Made For Me

Order in the house

Giselle POV:

Onika and I sat in Megan's office while waiting for her to start the session. I wanted her to hurry because before Nicki changed her mind, she had been bouncing by her leg since we sat. As each minute passed, the faster it moved.

"We won't be here long enough for her to uncover all your hidden traumas." I placed a hand on her thigh making her leg go still. Whatever she was afraid to unpack wasn't going to happen today, I'm sure it'll take more than one session.

"If I do have any trauma I'm sure it came from you." She didn't say it condescendingly, and I took no offense to it.

"You're probably right that's why we're here." If I could heal any part of her that I've damaged, I'll put in the work.

"Beyoncé, I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. I'm sure of that." Onika turned to face me and was starting to say something until the door opened.

"Sorry." Megan apologized entering. "You guys can continue, please don't let me interrupt." She beckoned for us to go on.

Glancing at my girlfriend, I waited for her to come to a decision. "Um, I said the most important thing." Nicki cleared her throat, sitting back on the couch.

"Well okay, Onika I know we spoke over the phone, but it's a pleasure to meet you in person." The lady sat down pulling out a pair of glasses.

"Yeah, you as well." I tried my best to hide my smile at her sarcastic tone. She had nothing against the lady, it was just the circumstances. Nicki still held a grudge for her suggestion she move out and use condoms.

"So what brings us here? Beyoncé you told me things were getting better." Megan asked me directly. As far as she knew, we were working out all those things we'd buried years ago. I hadn't updated her on anything that happened recently, not wanting to dive deep into it.

"We were." I shrugged. "We talked about Al the things we discussed." It was only one conversation and it had to be forced but it was had.

"The baby?" She questioned. "Did you tell her how you feel and why?" Were you satisfied with her reasons?" Well, damn. We usually eased into things, she wasn't playing any games today.

"Yes, I told her it hurt me." Nicki watched and waited for me to answer every question that was asked. "She said we weren't ready for a baby, and I get that." Truly, I did but it doesn't change the fact that it hurt me. I didn't want my children to grow up and resent me because they were raised in a toxic environment like I do with my parents.