rinse and repeat | lil peep

8

third person

"dr buckner and dr simmons will be beginning their morning rounds now" the unit clerk spoke over the pa system.

"how are you doing today maddie?" the doctor asked her. the room was cold and he had an unwelcoming expression on his face. his white coat was perfectly white and his shirt perfectly tucked and ironed.

"fine" she said, bored.

"i was impressed with your progress until your, incident, at group therapy yesterday" he said.

"it happens, okay?" she sounded annoyed, "i'm fine".

"i see you and another patient, gustav, have become quite close" the doctor pointed out.

"it's not against the rules to make friends?" she pointed out.

"a lot of inappropriate physical contact has been observed" the doctor rebutted.

"i'm fucking depressed, god forbid i receive a little comfort sometimes" maddie kept fighting.

"i understand that, however we do not want inappropriate relationships forming in place of developing real coping skills" the doctor continued.

"that isn't what's happening" maddie said.

"alright. due to yesterday, and in order to ensure this friendship is not an ill means of coping, i'm going to extend your admission form for one more week" he said, breaking the bad news to her.

internally, she wanted to scream and hit him. was he fucking kidding? she thought. but she had a sense of rationalism today and knew that would do no good. "okay" she said, submitting to another week of hell.

-

"how are you doing today gustav?" the doctor asked him

"good, and you?" he asked back. "i'm well, thank you". not that either of them truly cared, but they would pretend to.

"i have some good news for you today" the doctor said, catching gus' attention.

"we no longer believe you are an acute risk to yourself. as long as you agree to a once a week community check in order, we'd like to discharge you today" the doctor explained.

really? gus thought, but he knew better than to act like he didn't agree, or they'd keep you in longer. "that is good news" gus agreed.

"there is one thing i would like to mention. i understand you and another patient, maddie, have become quite close friends and i appreciate you are just trying to help. however, we need to allow her to form her own coping abilities instead of inappropriate relationships. that is another reason for your discharge. you are well enough to move your efforts and attention on to someone else, so we believe you to be mentally well enough to go home on your own?" the doctor asked.

"that is correct" gus agreed, just going along with whatever the doctor wanted to hear.

if he was getting out that must mean so is maddie, at least soon.

"i have to fill out some paperwork quickly, the nurses will collect your things and you will be good to go" he explained to gus, "sign here", he handed him the pen and paper to initial.

"you can wait by the nursing station" the doctor said, getting up to leave the room.

gus followed him out of the room, waiting by the nursing station as he was told.

his heart fell when he saw maddie coming up the hall, she wasn't waiting for her things too, that means she isn't leaving.

"mads" gus said to her, "i'm being discharged. i'm going home today" he broke the news to her

"what?" her smile dropped, "i'm stuck here for another week"

"well, i'm happy for you. go be free, what am i supposed to do without you?" she asked.

"it's just a week. the time will pass. i'll see you on the other side okay?" he assured her

"i don't even have any way to contact you" she reminded him.

"shit" he realized she was right.

"can i borrow a pen, really quickly?" gus asked the unit clerk. she handed one up without even really looking.

gus took the pen and took her arm, writing out the nine digits of his phone number.

"don't lose that okay, i'll be waiting for you" he told her, handing the pen back.

"i can't cry or they're going to keep me in even longer apparently. i'm gonna miss you so much gus, thank you for everything" she said, holding back tears

"i'll miss you too, but don't act like im leaving forever. i'll see you in a week alright?" he said, a security guard entering the unit to escort him through the locked doors.

she raised her hand, managing a pathetic wave from the other side of the glass now. what if she didn't see him in a week?