Aiden Harper

Betrayal trauma

Eden

After figuring out things with Aiden, I met with Casper to dive into betrayal trauma. I didn't want to skim over my main issue. Casper explained it in a way I understood it better. At least I didn't feel like I was losing my mind. That was a plus.

"I never realized betrayal trauma is a real thing," I said, shaking my head in disbelief.

"Oh, it's very real. Most people don't realize they suffer from it when they endure a betrayal from a partner or family member."

"Can couples survive betrayal trauma?"

"It depends on the couple. It helps if the betrayer takes responsibility for their role in the trauma. Most betrayers will gaslight the other person to ease the guilt. They don't realize they're inflicting constant trauma on their partner. There are many forms of infidelity in relationships—physical, emotional, mental, and financial."

"There's mental and financial infidelity?"

Casper nodded. "Forming a mental connection to someone who isn't your partner is mental infidelity. Lying about money or hiding it is financial infidelity."

I thought about what Casper said. It made sense when I pondered my relationship with my ex. All the signs were there, but I had missed them.

"Eden, don't blame yourself for missing the signs with your ex. People are excellent at hiding aspects of their lives from their partners. You're not the first person to encounter it."

"It doesn't help that I didn't have support from my family. It would have been nice."

"Not every family is supportive of someone who endures betrayal. People are willing to pull their support when you don't do what they want. They forget it's not their lives. People must decide what's best for them and not others."

"I spent so much time trying to earn the approval of my family that I wasn't happy. I don't want their approval anymore. I want to be happy."

"That's an excellent first step. Find what makes you happy. I want you to do an exercise before our next meeting."

"What's that?"

"Figure out what makes you happy."

"Can I have someone help me?"

"You can do whatever you want as long as you find things that bring you joy."

"Okay."

"We'll meet in two days. You can tell me what you discovered."

I nodded in agreement and thanked Casper for meeting me before leaving the church. I found Aiden sitting on the front steps, waiting for me. "What are you doing here?"

Aiden stood up and walked toward me. "I was waiting for you to finish your meeting. How'd it go?"

"I have an assignment. I need to find things that make me happy. You in?"

"Sure. It's not like I have anything to do at the moment."

"Good. I want to go rollerblading." I grabbed Aiden's hand and dragged him to the car. It was now or never.

******
Aiden

I wasn't expecting to go rollerblading with Eden after her counseling session, but I'll take it. We headed to a park to rent rollerblades for a few hours. After paying, we put the rollerblades on before handing our shoes to the girl at the rental place.

Eden wobbled on her blades while I watched her. She held out her hands to balance herself while inching forward.

"Have you ever rollerbladed before?" I asked.