[Joy and Sadness watch as guards haul off Bing Bong and began to follow.]
Bing Bong: (O.S.) Ow! Ow! Cut that out. Ow! Please... you can't do this! Do you like candy? You look hungry. I can get you candy! Please! Ow. Ow. Ow.
[Joy and Sadness watch Bing Bong being dragged far off to the dark, menacing entry of SUBCONSCIOUS.]
Joy: No, no no no, there go the core memories...!
[The door opens. SPOOKY LIGHT spills out.]
Bing Bong: I can't go in there. I'm scared of the dark. Please!
[He's thrown in and the door SLAMS SHUT. Joy and Sadness head after him, down the long stairway.]
Joy: What is this place?
Sadness: (hushed tone) The Subconscious. It's where they take all the troublemakers.
[Joy and Sadness hide. TWO CLUELESS GUARDS block the gate.]
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE My hat feels loose.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK Let me see. How to get in?
Sadness has an idea. She leads Joy around and behind the guards.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE You got my hat? Or, or is that your hat?
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK Yeah, it's my hat.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE You sure? I don't know, look in the label.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK Yeah, it says, "My Hat."
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE Wait, it says, "My Hat"?
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK "My Hat," it says.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE That's what I wrote in my hat.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK What are you talking about?
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE You've got my hat on.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK Okay, but it's my handwriting--
Sadness loudly SHAKES the door.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE Hey! You!
Sadness: Oh! You caught us! Heh.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK Get back in there! No escaping!
The guards shove them through and slam the door. Joy gives Sadness an approving nod: nice work. They head forward. This place is spooky.
Sadness: I don't like it here. It's where they keep Riley's darkest fears.
[Joy spots a dark shape ahead:]
Joy: It's broccoli!
[Behind them:]
Sadness: The stairs to the basement!
[They SCAMPER AWAY like frightened mice.]
Joy: Grandma's vacuum cleaner!
[The vacuum gives chase. Joy and Sadness lose it and hide behind a rock.]
Joy: (catching her breath) Okay, come on.
[Sadness makes a loud CRINKLING NOISE with each step.]
Joy: Would you walk quieter, Sadness?
Sadness: I'm trying!
Joy What is going-- (looking down) Candy wrappers.
They follow a trail of candy wrappers into the cave to find a crying Bing Bong in a balloon cage, atop a large mound.
Joy: Bing Bong!
Bing Bong: Joy?
Joy: There you are.
[The imaginary friend shushes and points. They are standing in front of a giant SLEEPING CLOWN,]
Joy: (terrified) It's Jangles.
[They gingerly approach Jangles. Joy climbs up to Bing Bong.]
Joy: Do you have the core memories?
He gives her the satchel. Joy holds them close.
Bing Bong: All he cared about was the candy.
[Joy helps Bing Bong squeeze through, but the balloon-bars make loud twisting noises. Jangles stirs. Joy freezes. She stretches them further... Success! Joy and Bing Bong hurry down and the trio rush away.]
Bing Bong:(CONT'D) We're out of here! Let's get to that train.
Joy: Wait. The train's not running. We still have to wake up Riley.
Sadness: But how?
[Joy and Sadness look back at the clown.]
Bing Bong: Oh no.
[Together, Joy and Sadness approach Jangles and HONK HIS NOSE. His eyes open. He stands. He's HUGE, towering over them.]
Joy: (loudly) H-hhey Sadness, did you hear about the p-pahh-party that we're having?
Sadness: Ohhhh yeah, yes Joy! Isn't it a babahh... birthday party?
Jangles: Did you say... birthday?
Joy: And there's going to be cake, and presents and--
Sadness: --and games and balloons--
Jangles: (pulls out a giant mallet) A BIRTHDAY?!?!
Joy: Okay. Follow us!
All three run towards the gate, followed by the giant clown!
Joy: Nothing like a good scare to wake you up, right, guys?
The guards inspect each others' hats.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK Okay, but it's my handwriting.
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD DAVE No, it isn't. That's my handwrit-- I wrote that!
SUBCONSCIOUS GUARD FRANK No, but THIS one's my handwriting--
BASH! Jangles' mallet smashes through, laughing maniacally. Our trio run up the stairs, Jangles close behind. The UNICORN DREAM is mid-production: a Glitter Dance Party, rainbows and sparkles aplenty. The crew is bored, even Fear in HQ. he set begins to shake. BLAAAM! Jangles crashes in.
Jangles: WHO'S THE BIRTHDAY GIRL?!?!
[Fear SHRIEKS, bashes a button and passes out Riley bolts upright in bed. The meter reads "AWAKE." Joy and Sadness do a happy dance.]
Bing Bong: Come on, let's go!
[They bolt, leaving Jangles gleefully demolishing the sets. Our trio leap aboard just as the train picks up speed.]
Joy: Ha ha! We made it!
Sadness: Whoo-hoo! Ha ha!
Joy: Guess who's on their way to Headquarters?!
Joy grabs Sadness and picks her up in celebration.
Sadness: We are!
Joy: Hauhauhau
Bing Bong: Haha
Joy: Wooo
Sadness/Joy/Bing Bong: Wahoo/Yay/Yippy
