Christian Camp | ✓

Doubting

- Ginny -

The study cabin's once rustic wooden walls were blackened - or at least the remains of them were. Ginny was reluctant to admit it, but the rather large oblong-shaped cabin that stood on the edge of the campsite was an eyesore. With its frail frame remaining and its roof long caved in, it looked less like a place of serene study and more like a burnt shed. She could hardly remember how it was a few days ago, with its spacious floors and bright walls dotted with Bible verses.

The smell of burning was still lingering in the air, an incessant reminder of the enemy's evil ploys to destroy both them and their faith in God. Nobody even knew how the fire had started - Tom had supposed one of the indoor heaters stored in there for the winter season had accidentally been turned on and caught fire, yet nobody had admitted that it was they who had turned it on in the first place.

"Thank Jesus the fire didn't spread to any of the other cabins." Maisie praised with a smile as they talked over the whole ordeal. All of Ginny's cabin mates alongside Libby, Gavin and Matthew were sitting in Ginny's cabin, having just finished studying a verse of Genesis. Ginny had enjoyed it immensely, having discovered Genesis 3:15 actually referenced Christ's rising from the dead and crushing the head of Satan. It reminded her that, although they had been in severe danger not days ago, Jesus had been faithful and had saved them and kept them from harm, despite the enemy's desperate and futile attempts.

"I know." Matthew agreed from where he sat, cross-legged on the floor with his back against Ruth's bed. "Our cabin is literally two down from it, right, Gav? God is so good!"

Gavin nodded with a weak smile, but, as Ginny watched him, she could tell that something was off. He had an expression she recognised all too well dwelling in his blue eyes - shame.

"What's wrong?" She whispered, nudging his knee with her own. Gavin tilted his head to look at her, and she was almost caught off guard by the intensity of the emotion on his face.

"Can we-" He cleared his throat. "Can we go somewhere to talk? Just you and me?"

The vulnerability in his voice sent Ginny's heart racing. She caught Libby's expectant smirk and willed her face not to turn scarlet. Really, after everything that had happened, it was almost laughable that Gavin still had the same affect on her!
"Ok." She nodded, rising hesitantly to her feet. "Me and Gav are just going for a walk to the games field. We'll be back soon." She added, turning to address her cabin mates.

Maisie raised her brow at her amusedly.

"See ya, sis! Don't take too long!"

Ginny barely restrained herself from rolling her eyes as she made her way across the cabin and out of the door, with Gavin following closely behind. Her heart was pounding furiously in her chest, but it wasn't as loud as the concern and curiosity that filled her.

Lord, what's wrong with him? She asked silently. She felt a soft prodding in her mind in reply.

Ask him.

She glanced tentatively at Gavin, who had now caught up with her and was walking by her side, his face lowered and his jaw tight. Something was clearly bothering him.

"What's this all about, Gav?" She asked quietly. It was a moment before Gavin finally sighed and turned to face her, his face crumpling.

"I doubted Him, Gin. When you and Matt were lost - I had these doubts in Him. I was just so worried about you and I doubted and-"
"Gavin, stop." Ginny interjected firmly. She tried to meet his eyes, but he fixed his gaze rigidly on the grass beneath their feet.

"It's ok to have doubts. We're not perfect - we're going to doubt! Even John the Baptist doubted when he was in prison - and Jesus Himself said he was the greatest man to live under the old covenant!" She paused for a short moment, trying to gauge his reaction, before continuing. "Faith isn't the absence of doubts. It's choosing to believe the truth over those doubts. Don't condemn yourself for doubting during a difficult time - learn from those mistaken doubts and keep running the race that Jesus has already set out for you. He loves you and He forgives you."

Gavin gaped at her, his eyes wide.

"What?" Ginny asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious. "Did I say something wrong?"

Gavin grinned.

"No, I just needed to hear that. The Holy Spirit really is strong in you."

Ginny felt her heart soar at the comment.

"All glory be to God." She murmured, shyly ducking her head. Why was she suddenly feeling so nervous? 

The grin slipped from Gavin's lips. 

 "I almost can't believe we're leaving this place in a few days. It feels like a second home to me." He murmured, glancing around at their sun-soaked surroundings. 

Ginny  hummed. 

 "I know. Will you be going straight to set?"

 "Yeah. I've got a plane booked for Friday. What about you?" He looked at her curiously. "What are you going to do when you leave camp?"

 "I don't know. I know that I'm going to stay in God's word no matter what direction I'm headed in though." 

 "What about your modelling? Can't you try that again?" Gavin asked hopefully. 

 "Maybe. I'd have to ask God about it first." Ginny mumbled. In truth, she was reluctant to return to such a judgmental field - but if she could use it to make Jesus more known to people then it would be well worth it. 

 "You'll do great, Gin. You've got God - you can do all things through Him who gives you strength, remember? Just have fun with it." Gavin intoned, shooting her a boyish grin. "Besides, I could always get you in contact with some people." He added jokingly. 

Ginny mock glared at him. 

 "Don't you dare, Gavin!"

 "What, don't you want to be America's next top celebrity?" 

 "No way!" 

 Gavin laughed, his blue eyes shining with amusement and something else that Ginny was afraid of admitting. 

 "I'm kidding, Gin! Seriously though, you'll be amazing. God's favour is on you." 

Ginny smiled gently. 

 "I know. He is with me - til the end of the age." 

Guys...!😢😭😭

'Tis finished! All glory be to the glorious Holy Spirit, who inspired this entire thing!!!!! ❤❤

Don't worry - I have an epilogue coming out soon, by the grace of God! 💖

What do you guys think Ginny and Gavin's ship name should be? Ginvin? 😂 Gavinny?🤔 

As usual, don't hesitate to pop your comments down below! ❤

Thank you all so so much for your constant support! You're all a blessing to me, and I pray that God is with you always and will strengthen you and clothe you in dignity and love in Jesus' mighty name!! ❤😊

God bless you all! 

I love you - but Jesus loves you more!!!!!!