* O L I V I A ' S P O V *
Listening to Louis Tomlinson was one of the solutions to my depression.
And One Direction. And Niall Horan. And all of them. I was going through my teenage boyband era again, only this time it was combined with the help of my breakup.
I'd stayed in a hotel in the outskirts of Oxford, just close enough to Oscar's house just in case I'd changed my mind. The worse thing was, I'd left my favourite hoodie on purpose. So he'd have it when he needed it.
Even if we'd broken up, I'd still cared for him.
As much as I didn't want to.
I was playing music on my phone, curled up in a ball and reading romance trilogies like a hopeless romantic. I'd done this loads before. It was normal, to come into this phase once again, but I hadn't expected so soon.
Pour, mercy mercy on me...
I squeezed my eyes shut. Only The Brave suited my mood, but not as much as I'd wanted to. I could easily go depressed if needed.
It was basically Louis' way of saying 'Love is Only For The Brave'. In a song, of course. He was correct. It was a subject only for brave people who could accept rejections, breakups and even deaths of your lover.
Even worse? The lyrics applied to my love life. After posting our breakup post on Instagram and pinning it to my account, I was never the same. Knowing that everyone could easily see we'd broken up, and the both of us were free.
It was fine.
Let's define 'fine' in my way. Doing horribly, crying, screaming, choking, coughing and throwing up. Getting suicide thoughts. Going into depression. My kind of 'fine' applied to every sort of suffering.
It wasn't fair. I chose to believe Oscar over Julia in the end, but things were already done. I still lost my trust in him that he kissed back. I was completely fine with it.
I'd done crazy things in the last few days. A whole list could be made. I streamed the three Maze Runner movies non-stop, listened to depressing songs, cried, read romance trilogies, watched One Direction nostalgic clips and cried again.
As I said. Everything was completely fine.
It only did last a month, really. I looked at the calendar. Two months until I could return to the bakery and get back to my job. I lost quite a lot of money in my bank account already, buying a few weeks at the hotel until I could get another job.
A few weeks costed me thousands. If we were talking least. Ten thousands. I expected the price. I was in Oxford. A beautiful place that attracted tourists and even the British. I had to find a job, of course. I wasn't about to throw everything away.
Suddenly, I'd received a call from Lando.
I used to learn editing back in the day. No doubt it was a great job. Not only could it be applied to videos, it could be used as a job.
"Just Monaco?"
"Please." Lando heard my venting. He was sympathetic enough to give me a free Paddock Pass to the Monaco Grand Prix and a job to survive on while I survived a few weeks in a hotel in London.
"No way. I can't see Oscar after this." I admitted. I heard a sigh from the other side.
"Look. You'll stay in my garage, and avoid all contacts with him. Does that work?" I grumbled as I looked at my book again. "Liv, please."
"Fine. Will there be a party afterwards?" I asked, even if the answer was obvious.
"Yes. You know that very well." Great. A chance to bond and meet new people, instead of obsessing over fictional men and actors. "Look... talk to Oscar. He hasn't been the same since."
