Ghana - JENSOO - english version

Chapter 32

Jennie

As soon as I walk into the hotel room, I notice Jisoo pacing back and forth in front of the bed, reading some papers in her hands. Her hair is tied up in a loose bun, she's wearing glasses, and if it weren't for the suitcase on the bed that seemed to be half-packed, I would have just stood there watching her.

"Were you packing your suitcase?" I slowly approach where Jisoo is, and she quickly looks up at me. I hold back a sigh when I notice that the sparkle in her eyes seems to have dimmed.

"Yeah, it's almost ready, and I think you should pack yours too. Our flight is tomorrow morning," she says, without looking at me.

"Our flight is in the late afternoon."

"I changed it to the morning. I need to get to Seoul as soon as possible," she says, her tone slightly irritated.

"Why?" I'm so confused by everything that's happening, and Jisoo doesn't seem willing to explain anything to me.

"Haein got me an audition. It's for the lead role in a drama he's going to be in." She still doesn't look at me, and I get irritated, knowing that if she gets the role, she'll have to film with him. I step closer to her and snatch the papers from her hands, finally making her look at me.

"You want to be in a drama with Haein? Why? You know I don't like him."

"Well, I don't like long-distance relationships, and you didn't bother to talk to me about your decisions, so why should I make the effort to do that for you?" she snaps, and I blink a few times, unable to believe what I just heard.

"You want to do this as revenge because I'm going to Paris?"

"You're making plans for your future without including me in them. It hit me that I need to start planning my own future too, so I don't end up depending on you," Jisoo says in that indifferent tone I hate, and I don't even know what I'm feeling anymore.

"That's not how it happened." I rub my face, and Jisoo takes a step back. "You talk like I don't want to be with you."

"Well, you're not showing it. You decided to leave for six months, and then what? What happens next?" she says angrily. "I'm not going to sit around suffering, waiting for six months for you to come back, only for you to tell me that you're staying there permanently."

"There's no way to know if that will happen." My eyes burn, and I take a deep breath. I won't cry, not here in front of her, especially when I don't even know why I'm crying.

"Of course there is. I know your work, Jennie, and it's impeccable. Chanel would be stupid not to hire you at the end of this internship, and we both know Chanel isn't stupid." She moves toward the bed and picks up the papers I had taken from her.

"I think it's unfair that you're punishing me for this. It's not my fault this opportunity came out of the blue."

"And I think it's unfair that you didn't even have the consideration and respect for our relationship to talk to me about it before making your decision. I would never have told you not to go or anything like that," Jisoo says, her determined look making it clear she's already made up her mind. "So yeah, I guess there's a lot of unfairness in the world, huh?"

"So, you're going to run off and throw yourself into Haein's arms? Why can't you come with me?"

"I'm not throwing myself into his arms," she snaps, more irritated than before. "And why should I go? You decided to leave without consulting me or checking if I had the availability or interest to go. You didn't include me in any of your future plans, and now you want me to change my life and move to another country for you? I don't even speak French!"

This time, Jisoo left me speechless. I think over her words, and my throat feels tight, making it hard to breathe. She stares at me for a few seconds with so much irritation and determination that I end up looking away, trying to come up with something to say.

I can't believe we're going to break up over this because, to me, it seems so trivial, so ridiculous. From the moment we started dating, I never thought about breaking up or what it would be like if it ended.

Even without looking at her, I know she's staring at me. It's almost as if Jisoo is waiting for me to give her a glimmer of hope, but how can I do that when I don't know anything?

It's ridiculous that I'm standing here in the middle of the room, frozen, while my girlfriend—maybe ex-girlfriend—glares at me, waiting for an answer when I don't even know what the question was.

"I'm going to grab my things and study at the hotel bar," she says, walking toward the door.

"Jisoo," I say simply, still facing away from her, and I sense that she stopped walking. "What are we?"

"I don't know, Jennie," I hear her sigh, and my eyes sting even more as a tear escapes, and I quickly wipe it away.

"How do you not know?" I clench my fists in frustration when I hear her words. I'm not even angry at her; I'm angry at myself for not knowing what to do. I feel so insecure and incapable.

"I honestly don't know," Jisoo replies as she continues walking, and I hear the door handle turning. "I'll be at the bar."

"Okay, good luck with your studying." I speak with my back still to her, and when I hear the door close, all the tears I was holding back suddenly flood out.