The healers heart

Chapter 8

Elena moved along the forest path, her mind occupied with thoughts of the patients she needed to see and the supplies she needed to gather. The air was still crisp, the last breaths of winter lingering in the damp soil, but there was a promise of spring in the way the trees rustled softly with the morning breeze.

She had been avoiding Rowan for days, ever since he had asked her to Ostara and she hadn't given him an answer. The weight of it had been pressing down on her, but she hadn't been ready to face him. There were too many tangled emotions—hers, his, and Mara's. And with Kaelen recovering in her cottage, her mind had been consumed with tending to him.

As she neared the edge of the forest, she heard footsteps behind her—familiar and steady. She knew who it was before he even spoke.

"Elena," Rowan's voice called out, quiet but firm.

She stopped and turned slowly, her breath catching in her chest. Rowan stood a few paces behind her, his broad frame silhouetted by the morning light. His expression was serious, his brown eyes dark with something she hadn't seen in him before.

"We need to talk," he said, stepping closer, the weight of his words hanging in the cool air.

Elena nodded, her heart sinking. She had known this moment was coming, but it didn't make it any easier. She took a deep breath, steadying herself.

"I know," she replied softly. "I've been meaning to talk to you too."

Rowan's jaw tightened, his frustration evident. "You've been avoiding me," he said, his voice laced with hurt. "Ever since I asked you to Ostara. I thought maybe you just needed time, but now... I don't understand."

Elena exhaled slowly, feeling the tension rise inside her. She hated that she had hurt him, but she hadn't known how to explain what she was feeling.

"I didn't mean to avoid you, Rowan," she said carefully. "I just... I didn't know how to give you the answer you wanted."

His brow furrowed as he searched her face, confusion and hurt mingling in his eyes. "Why? I thought we... I thought we understood each other. After everything... I thought you'd say yes."

Elena's heart ached as she listened to him, knowing how much her hesitation had hurt him. She had always cared for Rowan—there were even moments when she had imagined a life with him. But those thoughts had always been overshadowed by something else—something she hadn't been able to ignore.

"It's not that simple," she whispered, her voice trembling. "I couldn't give you the answer you wanted because... I never let myself fall in love with you."

Rowan's eyes widened slightly, his confusion deepening. "What do you mean?"

Elena hesitated, her chest tightening as she prepared to speak the truth she had kept hidden for so long. "I thought about it," she admitted, her voice soft but steady. "There were times when I wondered what it would be like if we were together. But I never let myself feel that way. I couldn't."

Rowan took a step closer, his brow furrowed in frustration. "Why not? Why couldn't you?"

Elena looked down for a moment, guilt washing over her. She hadn't meant for this to come out like this, but Rowan's persistence left her no choice.

"Because of Mara," she said, her voice quiet but firm. "She's been in love with you for years, Rowan. Ever since we were young. I couldn't let myself fall for you because I knew how much she cared about you."

Rowan blinked, taken aback. "Mara?" he repeated, his voice laced with disbelief. "She's in love with me?"

Elena nodded, feeling a pang of guilt for revealing her friend's secret. "Yes. She's loved you for as long as I can remember. But she's never told you, because she didn't want to get in the way. And I... I couldn't either."

Rowan stood there in stunned silence, his eyes clouded with confusion. "I didn't know," he murmured. "I never knew."

"She never wanted you to know." Elena replied softly.

For a moment, neither of them spoke. The weight of Elena's words hung heavy between them, and Rowan's expression shifted from shock to quiet reflection.

"I don't understand," he finally said, his voice quieter now. "Why didn't she ever tell me? Why didn't you?"

Elena sighed, her chest tight with the tension of it all. "I didn't want to betray her. And as for me..." She looked up, meeting his gaze with sadness. "I never let myself think about you that way because I couldn't do that to her. I care about you, Rowan. But not in the way you wanted."

Rowan's jaw clenched, the pain in his eyes unmistakable. "So that's it?" he asked, his voice thick with emotion. "There's no chance for us because of Mara?"

Elena shook her head, stepping closer, her hand brushing his arm gently. "It's not just because of Mara," she said softly. "It's because I never felt that way for you. I never let myself. And now, it's too late."

Rowan stood there, his gaze distant, the truth of her words settling over him. The hope he had held onto for so long seemed to dim, replaced by a quiet, painful acceptance.

"I wish you'd told me sooner," he murmured, his voice low. "I thought there was something between us."

Elena's heart ached for him. She had never wanted to hurt him, but now, standing here, she realized that there had been no easy way to avoid it. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I never wanted to hurt you."

Rowan swallowed hard, his gaze flickering with something else—something deeper. "And this man, Kaelen," he said quietly, his tone shifting. "I've heard people talking... you're alone in your cottage with him. Are you sure you're safe?"

Elena blinked, surprised by the question. "Kaelen?" she asked, frowning slightly. "Rowan, he's not dangerous. He's recovering from his injuries. That's all."

Rowan's expression darkened with concern. "But he's a stranger, Elena. You're alone with him every day. How can you be sure he's telling the truth?"

Elena felt her frustration rise. She knew Rowan was protective, but his concern for her safety felt misplaced. "Rowan, I've been a healer my whole life," she replied, her voice firm but calm. "I take care of people because that's what I do. Kaelen hasn't given me any reason to doubt him."

Rowan shook his head, his jaw tight with frustration. "I'm not saying you shouldn't help him. But I'm worried about you. You're out there, alone in the cottage, with a man you barely know."

Elena softened, understanding the care behind his words but feeling the strain of their conversation. "I appreciate that you're worried, Rowan," she said gently. "But I know what I'm doing. Kaelen isn't a threat."

Rowan stood there, silent for a moment, his eyes searching hers for something more. Finally, he sighed, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. "I just want you to be safe," he said quietly, his voice filled with concern.

"I know," Elena replied softly. "But you don't have to worry about me."

For a long moment, they stood there, the air between them filled with unsaid words. Rowan's concern, his frustration, his lingering feelings for Elena—all of it hung in the space between them. But beneath it, there was a quiet understanding. They both knew that things had changed, and there was no going back.

"I just need time," Rowan finally said, his voice thick with emotion. "I need time to figure all of this out."

Elena nodded, her heart heavy but relieved that the truth had finally come out. "Take all the time you need," she said softly. "I'll be here if you ever want to talk."

Rowan gave her a small, sad smile, though it didn't reach his eyes. "Thanks," he murmured, before turning and walking back toward the village, his steps heavy.

As Elena watched him disappear into the trees, she felt a mixture of sadness and relief. The conversation had been difficult, but necessary. And though it had hurt, she knew that they were both finally free to move forward.

The truth about Mara was now out, and Elena could only hope that Rowan would come to see what had been right in front of him all along. As for Kaelen, there were still many unanswered questions. But as she turned back toward the forest, Elena knew that, for the first time in weeks, her heart felt lighter.