A Young Mistake

Unexpectedly Crossing Paths

One night, lost in my thoughts, I received a call. It was Rohan-yes, Rohan. I almost didn't answer, but I picked up the call. For two minutes, there was complete silence on the other end, and then I heard a soft sobbing sound. He was crying, and the intensity of his pain became clear as his sobs grew louder. "Sona, Dad is no more... Dad isn't here," he cried, and my heart sank.

I knew Rohan struggled to find words in situations like this; his breaths came in shallow gasps. As I listened to him, memories of his came straight in my mind. I wanted to comfort him, to help him calm down, but then the memory of my own humiliation flashed before me. Despite my sadness for his loss-his dad was truly a kind person-I felt conflicted. He was still crying, and all I could bring myself to say was, "Everything will be okay," before I ended the call.

The next morning, I called Arjun. For the first time in three years, I mentioned Rohan. Arjun confirmed, "Yes, Sona, uncle is no more." Then, after a pause, he added something that shocked me. "I never told you this, but no one knew where Rohan had been for the last two years. He wasn't even around when uncle passed. He arrived much later, even after the funeral rites.

Where was he?" I asked.

Arjun replied, "Rohan and his mother had a huge conflict about six or seven months after you left. His mom kept insisting on him to marry Priya, but he just ignored it. Then one day, aunty gave him an ultimatum: if he wanted to stay a part of the family, he had to marry Priya. That's when Rohan stood up and left. He never came back after that. His entire family-his mom, uncle, everyone-tried looking for him, but no one knew where he went, what he was doing, or how he was.

For the past three years, I've kept myself busy, trying not to think about Rohan. But his voice, the way he was crying, keeps echoing in my ears. I haven't seen his face in all this time, yet I remember everything about him. Despite my efforts, I couldn't forget him. In these three years, I've managed to let go of everything else, but not him.

I've come to realize that this is how my life will be now. I can't even imagine being with someone else. It feels like life hasn't been fair to me-why did I have to meet him in the first place? What was my mistake to deserve all this? To this day, I don't understand what was wrong with me that made Rohan say such hurtful things, and for his mother to treat me so badly.

I'm still stuck on that path, unable to move forward.

I gave in and called Rohan that night. He answered, and I realized he was drunk. I had never seen Rohan drink before-he used to stay far away from alcohol. But this Rohan felt different. I asked him how he was, and after a long silence, I asked where he was. He replied, "At a bar."

I asked, "How will you get home? Is someone with you to take you?" because it was clear from his voice that he was way too drunk. Again, he didn't say anything. After a few seconds of silence, I heard a noise, like he had fallen. Maybe he stumbled. I could hear some people helping him up.

After a while, it sounded like he had reached a quieter place. I asked, "Are you still drinking?" He said, "No, my hand is empty. I've come outside," in a slurred voice.

I asked Rohan, "Just because I said that one line on the phone, you assumed something was going on between me and Arjun? How, Rohan? Didn't you trust me at all?"

In a loud voice, Rohan responded, "Arjun loves you! And you started spending so much time with him. Priya told me everything! Arjun talks to you all day and even goes to Varanasi without telling anyone-he was going to meet you! Why did you meet him behind my back? Tell me!"

After saying all this, Rohan suddenly went silent and, in a softer voice, murmured, "You didn't do the right thing, Sona. I'll never forgive you."

I was shocked to hear that Arjun might have liked me. I never knew-he never said anything. So I thought  he is drunk and just saying things which have nothing to do in reality and instead of saying anything about that to Rohan, I just asked, "How will you get home?"

Rohan, replied, "I won't go. I'll never go back to that home, the one that tries to keep me away from the memories of my Sona. I don't want to be with anyone who will take me away from my small, sweet, silly Sona. Not even you. I'll always keep that version of you in my heart, the Sona I first saw-the girl who would shyly glance at me from a distance, that simple, sweet girl."

He said all of this slowly, his voice heavy with the effects of alcohol.

Rohan cut the call, and he didn't pick up when I tried calling him again. I was left feeling helpless, unsure of what to do next. A few days went by, and I tried to distract myself from everything happening around me. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't shake off the worry about Rohan and his situation. It felt like I was stuck in a loop, with everything reminding me of him.

Rohan's mom called me from an unknown number one day, and she was crying on the phone, begging for forgiveness. She pleaded,

"Please forgive me, beta, and bring him home. His dad is no more, and I haven't heard my son's voice in two years. I won't force him into anything. Please, just tell him to come home. Whatever he wants to do, he can do. Even if you both want to get married, it's fine. Just bring my son back to me."

Hearing this, I was shocked. After all this time, why was this all happening again? Why was the same story repeating itself? I felt like life was pulling me back into something I thought I had escaped. I couldn't understand why, after so long, things were still not coming to an end. It felt like fate just wouldn't let this chapter close, no matter how hard I tried.

I understand aunty's situation, but what about me? What about everything that happened to me? In that moment, I could only say one bitter word: karma - karma anuty How can I forget that slap that insult which you and your son did?

Aunty said, "I was wrong, beta, I just want my son back." But I replied, "I have nothing to do with your son anymore. I don't care what he does with his life." And with that, I hung up the call.

But deep down, I knew I still thought about him, and maybe, for the rest of my life, I might never forget him. That 15 Year-old girl who fell in love with a random boy, not even knowing what love really was... It's been 3 years since Rohan and I parted ways, and maybe these 3 years will turn into 30. But I've realized, no matter how much time passes, I won't be able to move on from him. I've accepted that now.

I can't stand next to any guy, even if he's just a friend. I can't talk to them. That bubbly girl faded away the moment Rohan walked out of my life. It wasn't just my love that left with him, but my pride, my confidence, and all the dreams we had shared. Everything feels lost, and I can't seem to find it again.

I can't change my past, but I don't want to spend my future like this. I have to meet Rohan, I need to talk to him. After all the pain I've endured, I need to know why-why did he leave me when he loved me so much? Why did it end like this?

And yes, I called him. Despite all the insults and everything that happened, I still picked up the phone and dialed his number.