Flowing Through Pages

Chapter 34

Chapter 34.

Divorce

"I'll just go to the restroom," saad ni Kuya bago humiwalay ng yakap sa akin. Ate and I watched as he quickly walked toward the house.

Ate chuckled. "You know he's going to cry, right?"

I sighed. "Yeah."

I know it, that's why I didn't want to tell him anymore. He's already dealing with a lot, and now he'll start worrying about me too. He's always been like that---shouldering everything to protect us, his weakness. Even when he was cast out of the De Vera legacy, he accepted it without complaint, as long as he had Ate Amaris by his side.

Seriously, he's so weak. . . but at the same time, so strong for bearing all the pain.

"Pero, hindi mo pa sinasabi sa amin ang totoong dahilan bakit ka napunta rito sa Santa Maya. . ." ani Ate habang nagpupunas ng luha.

Natigilan ako at umiwas ng tingin. I was hesitant to tell her the truth, but if there was one person I could confide in, it was her.

"Hindi ko sasabihin kay Clav," dagdag niya pa. "Your husband, where is he---" she paused, sensing the shift in my mood.

"Kal?" she whispered.

"We. . . we decided to take some time apart," I said, struggling to get the words out. The memory of that night hit me hard, stirring a deep ache of missing him.

"Kal," bulong niya. I felt her move closer, wrapping her arms around mine, trying to comfort me.

"I just needed some space to really think," I muttered.

"Did you figure things out?" she asked.

I paused, a faint smile tugging at my lips. "I'm not sure. . . but I miss him so much."

It's ridiculous, really. Instead of finding clarity, all I've done is miss him even more. I just want to go back to him, to stop overthinking. I want to let things flow and just be with him.

Ate took a deep breath. "Being a wife is tough. . . just like being a husband. Believe me, noong nagsisimula pa lang kami ni Clav, dumating din ako sa ganiyang desisyon."

Binaling ko ang buong atendyon sa kaniya, medyo gulat. Really? Even if they're seemed unbreakable?

"Yes," natatawa niyang sinabi. "Medyo nakakatawa kapag naalala ko pero totoo. I took a break from him for a few days because I needed some space, and that was okay." She looked at me and offered a reassuring smile. "If you ever feel lost and overwhelmed, it’s fine to take a step back. Give yourself the space to breathe, reflect, and make sense of things. That’s totally okay."

I let out a sigh. Every word she said struck a chord with me, and I couldn't help but feel touched by how comforting her tone was.

"But you know, at the end of the day, I always go back to him," she chuckled.

"Why?" I asked.

"Why, you say? Hm, kasi mahal ko. 'Yon lang."

"Even if you feel like you're hurting him?"

Napahinto siya saglit sa aking tanong ngunit dahan-dahang tumango. "Even so."

"Even if you think you don't deserve him?"

Once again, she nodded. "Even so."

"Even---"

"Kal," she interrupted, stopping me in my tracks. "I will always go back to him, no matter what. Not just because that's what being a husband and wife means, but because that's how deeply I love him."