The Choice

40) Aurora

I stride out of the bathroom drying my hair with a towel to find Omer not there in the room.

"Omer!"

I hear faint music coming from the kitchen, discarding the towel I stroll outside.

"bab- I stop blinking at the view in the kitchen. I make sure I'm not drooling and lean against the hallway to watch. He's standing shirtless in the kitchen his back and chest on display and his grey pants standing low on his waist showing the taut muscles of his back and waist. 

And he's dancing. 

To a Spanish song.

He's swaying around doing the typical dance of X. Throwing his head back moving with his upper body as well. His waist, shoulders and legs moving all in harmony with the beat. I stride to where he's standing and sit on one of the stools of the kitchen island. He notices me and gives a small smile and a wink feeding me a strawberry. I eat it grazing his thumb with my tongue and he licks his lower lip eyes dipping to my mouth. He leans in kissing me tasting the sweetness of the strawberry on my tongue and his too.

He pulls back smiling against my lips whispering, "divine." I smile too as I play with the hairs at the back of his neck.

 Another song plays; his smile turns into a grin as he pulls me to my feet twirling me a couple of times before nestling me at his side swaying to the music. I giggle and muse, "someone's in a good mood" he hums, "the best mood."

He twirls me again and we revolve around each other then I spin back into his arms. He smirks, "you have a good dancing teacher" I raise my brow, "or maybe I'm a good student." He leans in to speak in my ear, " A very good student."

My cheeks heat at his tone and the electricity he shoots through my body. Whenever I'm close to him I feel that I could turn to fire anytime. The good kind of fire and electricity after being numb and emotionless for years.

He nudges my nose with his, "where'd you go?" he asks concerned. I shake my head, "nowhere, I'm with you." He tilts his head not believing me, of course he wouldn't let it pass. I shake my head closing my eyes resting my head on his chest exactly like I did the first time we danced in the event.

He plays with my hair for a bit before saying softly, " you cannot escape it every time, dove." I open my eyes still not lifting my head; not brave enough to look in his eyes now. "escape what?"

"Escape the problems inside you by overwhelming yourself." He says slowly.

"I'm not overwhelmed with anything." I say with equal softness. He makes me look at him, I lower my gaze and he lifts it again raising a brow, "going for sex and getting it the harsh way isn't overwhelming enough?" he asks and I close my eyes and whisper, "I need it." A tear escapes and he says, "I'll give you anything, but I'm scared, dove. Scared you'll burn yourself."

"I won't" I murmur, "not with you in here." I place a hand on my heart, he leans in kissing the same spot. "it's not about me, my love. I'm here, I always will be. This is about you, talk to me about it. Tell me so we can fix it together."

I let out a strangled sound, "that's the problem, Omer. The struggle and war inside me, I have a lot of voices in my mind, they don't get me to sleep and I only sleep with you. Imagine how hard is that for someone who has always been alone. A together is a doubted promise to a lonely person."

" How could I get it to trust me?" he asks intently, I shake my head, " oh, Omer trust is a small word to what I have towards you. If I could place my whole life in someone's hands it would be yours."

"I know you trust me, I meant the small monster inside, the one that makes the chaos. If it trusts me, I can mend to it."

I look at him longly then I speak, "do not make me doubt your love. I love wholeheartedly, Omer, do not make me regret it like it happened with the rest. And... Do not hide anything from me, do not push me away. Even if you felt your love start to fade or falter, tell me."

He gives me the softest smile before cupping my face, " I give you my word, I'll do all of that. But my love for you, dove, it's etched so deep inside me it became a part of my being."

I smile through tears, "it feels new to be loved and chosen. "

" I'll work on it till it becomes your nature, my love. And for being chosen, I'd choose you, dove. Even if they wiped away my memory numerous times, I'll still choose you."

I look at him, but it's not me that looks at him now, it's the unhealed child that dreamt of having someone like him to come and rescue her, " I love you, Omer. "

A grin, " and I love you too, dove. "