Running Home to You-3

Time God

I am so happy to be back!!! I love this story and the characters so much.

Anna's POV

"This is your home?" The Speed Force asks as I lead her into Barry and my loft.

"Barry picked it out for us as a pre-engagement/ wedding gift." I explain. Nora is sleeping soundly in her stroller as I put her diaper bag down. I push Nora's stroller towards the couch and put the locks on before going to search for Barry's blanket.

"This blanket is quite well-loved." The Speed Force comments as they examine it.

"He's had it for years."

"How does swaddling himself help?" They ask me.

"Well, it's not about the blanket. It's more like figuratively and literally wrapping himself in the memories and the comfort associated with the blanket." I explain its significance to them. They do the same, and a smile appears on their face.

"It's like being hugged by warm, loving arms." They comment.

"His mother made it for him." I share. "He doesn't really talk about her much, so..."

"Not even with you?" They question.

"To be honest, we don't share a lot of things with each other about the people we've lost." I open up. "I've barely talked to anyone about my parent's murder. So I have no reason to expect he would share about his." I state. "His situation was different. He had so many memories of his mother and a close relationship and...I barely can remember what my parents look like. They were murdered in front of me when I was four, and my memories are foggy at best from that time." I explain.

"Do you feel like he wouldn't understand what you've both been through?"

"I spent so much time trying to forget my parent's murder, and then I spent time being angry over their deaths, and now I just want to be at peace. I never desired to bring them back like Barry has with his mother."

"And why's that?"

"I feel like my parents would be ashamed of me. Of the person I became and...the things I've done. Compared to Barry, I have a messed up past, and...nothing I've done now makes up for the damage I've caused."

"You're a different person than you once were. I...I may not know everything, but I know you're a good person."

"Good is a relative term." I look at them with sadness in my eyes.

"That must have been traumatic for you both to experience such tragedy so young." They empathize with me.

"I know it's hard, especially for him, to be reminded of what happened; he's forced to think about that night. The violence of it all...it stays with him." I state. "I was lucky out of the two of us. I remember being sad, but I don't remember them dying. Barry remembers it all. I wish I could take that away for him." My hair flies around me as The Speed Force speeds away. "Damnit." I grab my phone and use the satellites to track The Speed Force.

I finally found The Speed Force in Jitters. "I thought I would find you somewhere Barry knows. And your signature finally showed up on my satellite, so that helped." I state.

"I know how he loves the coffee here." The Speed Force replies. I take a seat and pick Nora out of the stroller so I can hold her. "I never took into account how much his mother's death might still weigh on him. What have I done? I'll change my appearance. Appear in my true form to all of you, from now on, as lightning, because I can't keep hurting him like this."

"You're not causing him pain." I try to get through to her. "You're giving him a gift."

"How?"

"It's like how his blanket reminds him of his mom, and that memory gives him comfort and peace. It's the same thing with you."