IS LOVING HER A SIN? (Fem X fem reader) LGBTQ+ story

Chapter 14: tides of change

Tides of Change

As the days turned into weeks, I found myself watching from the sidelines as María and Luke's relationship blossomed. It was like a slap to the face every time I saw them together, laughing, holding hands, and sharing stolen kisses. My heart ached as I realized that I was no longer the one who made her smile or the one she turned to when the world became too heavy to bear.

One Friday evening, I was sitting on the steps of my porch, the warm glow of the sunset reflecting the turmoil within me. I could see them from a distance at the park, their silhouettes framed by the fading light. Luke was leaning against a tree, his curly blonde hair catching the sun's rays, while María leaned in close, her laughter ringing through the air like music. It was as if the world around me faded, and all I could focus on was how effortlessly they fit together.

"Hey, you alright?" My friend Jake, a boy from school, interrupted my thoughts as he plopped down next to me.

"Yeah, just peachy," I replied, my tone dripping with sarcasm. "Can't you see I'm in the middle of a love story gone wrong?"

He raised an eyebrow, glancing over to where María and Luke were. "That girl is a total hoe. you know. You're way better off without her."

"Yeah, well, it doesn't feel that way," I sighed, watching as María playfully pushed Luke away when he leaned in for a kiss. My chest tightened at the sight. "It's just hard seeing her move on like that, especially after everything we had."

"Maybe it's time to let go," Jake suggested, his voice softening. "You can't keep holding on to something that's already slipped away."

"I know," I admitted, my heart heavy. "But it's easier said than done. We had something real, and now I feel like a ghost watching her live a life I thought could be ours."

Jake frowned, and after a moment, he spoke again. "You deserve to be happy too, Olivia. Don't let her choices define your worth."

I nodded, but his words did little to ease the pain gnawing at my insides.

As I lay in bed that night, I couldn't shake the images of María and Luke from my mind. I tossed and turned, the weight of regret heavy on my chest. I reached for my diary, hoping that writing it all down would somehow lift the burden.

Dear Diary,

Today was rough. I saw María with Luke again. They looked so happy together, and it felt like I was being stabbed in the heart over and over. I know I shouldn't feel this way; I should be happy for her, but the truth is, it hurts. It hurts to see her smiling at him, to know that I'm not the one who brings her joy anymore. I miss the way we used to talk, how we shared our secrets and dreams. I feel so alone right now.

I can't believe I let myself fall so hard for her, only to be tossed aside like an old toy. Maybe I should have fought harder, said something different, done something to make her choose me. But what's the point now? She's with him, and I'm here, just a memory in her past.

What am I supposed to do now?

With a heavy heart, I closed the diary and tried to sleep, but my mind kept wandering back to the park and the joy María seemed to radiate with Luke. It was suffocating, and as days turned into weeks, I felt more and more like a bystander in my own life.

Two weeks later:

The sun was setting, casting a warm glow over the park when I stumbled upon them again. They were nestled together on a blanket, laughing as Luke shared a funny story about his time at school. My stomach churned as I watched him brush his fingers through María's hair, and I couldn't help but feel the pang of jealousy course through me.