raspberries and mocha | heejake

39

Jake paced back and forth in the small living room, his hands running through his hair in frustration. Sunoo and Jungwon sat on the couch, exchanging worried glances as they watched their eldest hyung's turmoil unfold.

"Can you believe it?" Jake exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "I was just about to apologize to Heeseung, to make things right, and then I see him with some random girl! Like, what the hell? One minute he's all mine, and the next, he's laughing and giggling with a woman!"

Sunoo leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "Did you even talk to him? Maybe she's just a friend."

"A friend?" Jake scoffed, rolling his eyes dramatically. "They looked way too comfortable for just being friends! I mean, they were practically sharing secrets and laughing like they've known each other for years. I don't get it! How could he just move on like that? I thought we actually had something..."

Jungwon crossed his arms, nodding in understanding. "It's rough, hyung. But maybe there's a reason for that. You two were kind of all over the place, you know? Heeseung hyung probably needs space after everything that happened."

Jake's voice cracked, and he could feel the heat of tears welling in his eyes. He dropped onto the couch beside Sunoo, burying his face in his hands. "I don't know, man. I just feel so stupid. I was too scared to admit my feelings, and now I might have lost him forever. He could've been my everything, and I just...let him slip away."

Sunoo leaned back, his brows furrowing. "But that's the thing, hyung. You can't just give up because you saw him with someone else. What if he's still into you? Maybe he's just trying to distract himself from the pain, too."

Jake looked up, tears spilling over his cheeks as he shook his head in despair. "I don't want him to distract himself! I want him to be with me! I want to be the one making him laugh, making him happy. But now I'm just...nothing." He felt the weight of his emotions crashing down on him, and he let out a choked sob.

"Hey, don't be so hard on yourself," Jungwon said softly, placing a comforting hand on Jake's shoulder. "We've all been there. Just think about what you want. If you really want Heeseung back, you need to figure out how to show him that."

Jake nodded slowly, wiping his tears with the back of his hand. "I guess I just need to figure out how to fix this...somehow." The thought of Heeseung being with someone else stung more than he could bear, but he knew he had to try.

Sunoo, sensing the heaviness in the air, leaned in closer, his voice low and encouraging. "Hyung, the first step is figuring out what you want to say to Heeseung hyung. You don't have to have it all figured out right now, but think about how you feel. What do you want to tell him?"

Jake sighed, his heart aching at the thought of Heeseung. "I just...I want him to know that I'm sorry. I was scared and stupid. I thought I could push him away and protect myself, but all I did was hurt him. I can't let him think I don't care."

Jungwon nodded, his expression thoughtful. "Mm, good start. You should definitely tell him how much he means to you. It sounds like you've been bottling all of this up. Heeseung hyung deserves to know how you feel."

Jake wiped his eyes, trying to regain some composure. "But what if it's too late? What if he's moved on for good? What if he's happier with her?"

"Then at least you'll know you tried," Sunoo said firmly. "And that's better than sitting here wondering 'what if' for the rest of your life. Trust me, you don't want that. You don't want to look back and regret not saying anything."

Jake inhaled deeply, considering Sunoo's words. "I need to be honest with him. I can't keep running away from my feelings."

"There we go!" Sunoo flicked his fingers.

"Exactly!" Jungwon chimed in, his excitement growing. "And remember, he's human, too. He might be feeling confused about everything just like you are. This could be your chance to clear the air."

Jake felt a flicker of hope at Jungwon's words. "But what if he doesn't want to talk to me? What if he's really moved on?"

"Then you'll deal with that when the time comes," Sunoo said gently. "But you owe it to yourself and to him to at least try. It'll eat you alive if you don't."

With a heavy heart but a growing determination, Jake finally nodded. "Okay, I'll do it. I'll talk to him. But it's going to be scary."

Sunoo smiled, leaning back in his seat. "That's part of the process, hyung. Just remember to be honest and be yourself. Heeseung hyung fell for you because of who you are, not just because of what you say or how you look."

Jake wiped away the last of his tears, the lump in his throat slowly dissipating. "Thanks, guys. I really needed this. I just—I can't keep pretending everything is fine when I feel like I've lost the best thing that ever happened to me."

Jungwon squeezed Jake's shoulder. "You haven't lost him yet. There's still a chance. Just don't let fear hold you back anymore."

Jake took a deep breath, feeling a mix of nervousness and determination.

a/n: apologizing for the slow and lazy updates, i'm just very unmotivated rn with exams and shit. i'm acc so sorry wtf??? y'all deserve better fr. and i should really start planning shit out bc i'm in a serious debate--

jaywon special chap or heeseung's perspective after this? (please answer)

-dwaekkiverse