raspberries and mocha | heejake

49

Jake stood at the edge of his apartment, pacing. His mind raced, trying to make sense of everything—his emotions, his regrets, and the mess he'd created with Heeseung. He didn't even know why he kept showing up near the restaurant or why he thought seeing Heeseung from afar would help. It was like self-torture, but he couldn't stop.

Now, all that was irrelevant. Jungwon had just shown up out of nowhere, his arms crossed and expression unreadable, demanding answers Jake wasn't prepared to give.

"Did you show up at the restaurant or not?" Jungwon's voice was sharp but steady, the type of tone that said he wasn't in the mood for excuses.

Jake blinked, startled by the sudden question. How the hell did Jungwon know about that? Jake had been careful, hadn't he? His heart raced as he tried to backtrack. "Wait... how did you see me?" he stammered, confusion and panic setting in. "Sure, you've got good eyesight, but not that good—"

Jungwon rolled his eyes, unimpressed. "You seriously thought you could slip by unnoticed?" He stepped closer, his arms still folded. "Jake, if you were trying to be sneaky, you failed miserably."

Jake felt his stomach drop. "What do you mean?"

Jungwon's gaze was steady, unwavering. "Heeseung saw you."

Jake's heart plummeted at those words, a knot tightening in his chest. Fuck.

He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Panic welled inside him, twisting into something between guilt and dread. Heeseung saw him? All this time, he thought he had been careful, thought he could just observe from a distance without causing more trouble. But no. He'd been caught—and by the very person he was avoiding.

He ran a hand through his hair in frustration, dragging out a sigh. "How... how much did he see?" he finally managed to ask, his voice small, almost defeated.

Jungwon's expression softened, though his tone remained firm. "Enough."

Jake closed his eyes and cursed under his breath. Of course, he had messed it up again.

He looked at Jungwon with a half-hearted smile, trying to mask how broken he felt inside. "Guess I really can't do anything right, huh?"

Jungwon sighed but didn't respond immediately. There was sympathy in his gaze, but also an unspoken warning: Stop screwing around, or you're going to lose him for good.

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Jake unlocked the door to his apartment, shoulders sagging under the weight of exhaustion. The dim light from the hallway flickered above him as he stepped inside, the creak of the door announcing his arrival to the emptiness within. He kicked off his shoes with a grunt, dropped his keys on the cluttered kitchen counter, and slumped against the nearest wall, letting out a breath he didn't even realize he'd been holding.

He rifled through the mail he'd picked up on his way in, hoping for something—anything—that wasn't another bill. But of course, luck wasn't on his side. Rent was due again. The numbers on the paper felt like they were taunting him, and his stomach churned as he did the math in his head.

"How the fuck am I supposed to pay this?" he muttered bitterly.

He hated this—hated the way life had slowly backed him into a corner. The bills kept piling up, one after another, and the paycheck from his job wasn't cutting it. His pride wouldn't let him ask for help from anyone. Not Jungwon. Not Sunoo. Not Jay. Not Sunghoon.

And definitely not Riki, or Heeseung.

The thought of Heeseung made his chest ache. Even thinking about him felt like salt in a wound that refused to heal. Jake could still feel the sting of their last conversation, the way Heeseung had slipped through his fingers like sand. Every moment without him was unbearable, but he had to keep going.